'Nowhere' Roadways
Days and weeks passed, then months. Smaller circles were made up of ones living in the West and ones living in the East.
I yearned for the breaking away of any ties. I was never meant for this world. I used to be all about sticking together and growing the overall numbers. But deep down that was not who I was. I felt that freedom was somewhere in outer space, or somewhere faraway and a sanctuary where only I could dwell. That's where my spirit was, I never longed for things of this world. My body was always tired, but my soul had learned where all the lines were, and I navigated them with ease.
There was a distinct sadness of things that I could still reach in the past, but I could only go there where they were already decayed. Some places and things having not aged, and some having aged so much that they would crumble at the slightest breeze on the wind. But wind was rare in so many places of the past. Everything was still.
I would dream of being totally alone and without a navigational sense of what borders I could reach and what ones were too far away. They would be stretched out over fairly organized cities and suburban areas. Stopping would bring the infinite ways to measured area and location within any place I'd halt and travel by foot. Any whim to flee once taking to ground would be difficult without knowing the hour, or a tune.
The grounds were solid but there was something frail about anything above them. I could see time within walls and windows, but it was slow and tedious, as if they were taking long amounts of time to fall into dust. It wasn't in everything, but mostly it was.
I would find myself in the middle of all these house and neighborhood roads that were all strewn together like giant spider webs. I'd be looking for our house but then I'd stop and think 'Wait, we don't live here anymore. Why am I here? I want to stay here always though. I loved this place.'
But any house in my pathway was there as we had left it. But things were missing. I would look for them. I remembered things and the place itself, that just wasn't in the waking world. Feelings really. Just remnants of memories that took on times of their own. Like a hidden layer of experiences that only happened in dimensions accessed through dreaming. Where a table would have been polished in ordinary waking life, in the dream, it was used to place things on from nearby trees and old flowerbeds, an ancient stone or a lost ornament from a chime, and restored with ghostly hands. Things that never were, were very real here. I repaired so many things that others had carelessly broken.
Sometimes I'd walk, but other times I was riding a bicycle. It was faster for me to walk because the bike only slowed me down.
I would be getting so near to a place that I went to before. I was almost sure this is the right street. I'd think I remember all these houses. I'd come up to what I thought was our old house and upon closer examination I would find that it was the wrong house, and then to my horror I'd find that it wasn't even the same neighborhood. I thought I'd navigated the right area and found that it wasn't so. Everything looked the way I remembered it. But it wasn't my living memory exactly.
Long deserted roads, they were. Lonely grey-brown pathways. Then I returned to the wrong place again and there stood someone or a few family members and they'd be looking through the same place, too.
"It's so abandoned now, did we actually used to live here?" I'd say, approaching them.
"It wasn't taken care of once we moved." Rachel answered.
"Why does it look so dead? The walls are so decayed that it'll all need to be rebuilt." I pointed out.
I felt like crying because it seemed so lost, so utterly gone. Whatever memories we had were dying and I tried to remember what songs we sang there. What we did and what games we'd play. Yet amid the sadness I would be marking points in a sub-conscience way to remember the pathways. I was still navigating. I have found there were many places that I remembered in dreams that never were in real life.
So, slowly I began to touch the walls and they'd give way and beams that still stood suddenly were shrouded in a shower of sparkles and there would be a faint blue light that allowed us to see into the other rooms in the gloom.
"Look! Hey that old icebox is still in the kitchen!" Rachel exclaimed happily.
"I wouldn't open that." I said back.
For several long moments we stared at the thing and didn't move an inch. Finally the silence was broken. "Are you going back?"
"Yeah, I have to get back, I think it's getting close to four."
"Do you wake that early?"
"Yes. I mean no." I looked around the place again and said "The hour of four is the way out of here."
And with that we left the area. But I knew we'd always be back to this zone, a place, long ago given to the memory of being nowhere.
Wednesday, July 15, 2015
Tuesday, July 14, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 6
The Stairs Beyond The Basement (Grey Basement)
When the crisp air of the outside world drifted through the windows above the clouds, I could dream long hours, and explore. There it was again, the house with the basement. In this dream it was brightly lit. The sun was outside, and the interior all concrete.
Two large rooms and the grey color was as bland as one would expect. Non-eventful and even forgetful. Again more stairs into further depths under the house. I only went as far as the first two sets of stairwells this time. There seemed to be something down there. However the impression I felt was that as I avoided it, it avoided me.
I tried to grasp things in these rooms, to set up 'markers' but couldn't seem to move in the same way as I would when I was awake and I had to re-establish the movement in this place because there was a slight fog and it made the atmosphere thicker somehow. The markers were for but one purpose, and that was to have recall or some recollection to mark that way back, if I should go venturing into the dark.
I stopped before the door, then I thought of when I was outside I'd go through cities and towns that I knew and everything had changed. I'd search endlessly, just going in circles, round to the same points. Thousands of miles and going much too fast to pick up on small details that I knew were there. Areas themselves would still be as I remembered from somewhere else before, but there was change. There was always a different 'light' and something else was marked. Perhaps by someone else.
So I stood by the grey basement door and I thought how odd that these other places always changed to such a degree that there were no recollections of them that I could name. That not even the furniture and other objects could be in the slightest of corners of memory. But I still remembered them and couldn't figure why I knew the place.
I backed away from the basement door. The door was open but the other passageway below was locked tight with iron bolts. I searched the house and went outside and everything was all wrong, all bent, all distorted. I traveled through the ways outside, out in the light but there died in me the desire to find whatever it was I started to seek. I would go on like some aimless robotic dreamer with no goal. No markers. All these changed familiar places.
I looked back and yet I was glad that I was on the other side of the outer structure rather than on the inside where iron bolts held what, to me, felt like death. The grey basement faded and was no longer 'marked'.
When the crisp air of the outside world drifted through the windows above the clouds, I could dream long hours, and explore. There it was again, the house with the basement. In this dream it was brightly lit. The sun was outside, and the interior all concrete.
Two large rooms and the grey color was as bland as one would expect. Non-eventful and even forgetful. Again more stairs into further depths under the house. I only went as far as the first two sets of stairwells this time. There seemed to be something down there. However the impression I felt was that as I avoided it, it avoided me.
I tried to grasp things in these rooms, to set up 'markers' but couldn't seem to move in the same way as I would when I was awake and I had to re-establish the movement in this place because there was a slight fog and it made the atmosphere thicker somehow. The markers were for but one purpose, and that was to have recall or some recollection to mark that way back, if I should go venturing into the dark.
I stopped before the door, then I thought of when I was outside I'd go through cities and towns that I knew and everything had changed. I'd search endlessly, just going in circles, round to the same points. Thousands of miles and going much too fast to pick up on small details that I knew were there. Areas themselves would still be as I remembered from somewhere else before, but there was change. There was always a different 'light' and something else was marked. Perhaps by someone else.
So I stood by the grey basement door and I thought how odd that these other places always changed to such a degree that there were no recollections of them that I could name. That not even the furniture and other objects could be in the slightest of corners of memory. But I still remembered them and couldn't figure why I knew the place.
I backed away from the basement door. The door was open but the other passageway below was locked tight with iron bolts. I searched the house and went outside and everything was all wrong, all bent, all distorted. I traveled through the ways outside, out in the light but there died in me the desire to find whatever it was I started to seek. I would go on like some aimless robotic dreamer with no goal. No markers. All these changed familiar places.
I looked back and yet I was glad that I was on the other side of the outer structure rather than on the inside where iron bolts held what, to me, felt like death. The grey basement faded and was no longer 'marked'.
Monday, July 13, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 7
On A Balcony Waiting Out The Dark
"These sliding doors don't have any screens, do they?" I asked. Then I heard a muffled yes. I stood on a balcony where there was a lush green lawn before me. It was a backyard that lead to a line of shrub and tree in the short distance away. The evening was peaceful, and the warmth felt nice. The dullness was welcomed. There was a porch but the brick and stone structure made it seem like a grand balcony that overlooked a secluded yard that was located near the hilltops of some small wooded locale. The only light emitted from a nearby street lantern located near the back dim porch light.
Dusk was just setting in. There was no one in the yard. I seemed to be on watch. I could smell the salty air. The sea was nearby only a few miles away. I faintly recall the moonlight upon the surface of dark water. I stood there and looked out. Something was in the woods. I fell quiet so that even my breathing could not be detected. I waited.
I could hear the ticking of a clock somewhere from inside the house. Something was heading for the house. Others in the house were oblivious to any sense of movement outside. I saw the shadows come out from the green that by now had turned shapeless in the coming night.
A darkness proceeded with no retreat. I turned toward the sliding doors and the screen was blocking me from the inside. I was going to try to lock the door behind me and step out another door to watch whatever it was, like a guardian. I wanted to keep it away. I was doing rather well as I hadn't been detected. Then someone else inside the house slowly slid the door then left the door slightly open. I stood there hiding beside the porch still looking out at the dark shade of the nearby trees, and never really seen anything move or attack, but I felt its presence.
The night hours seemed unnaturally long. I almost forgot and walked back to the door. The humming of a transformer droned on. No electricity was failing, so I knew whatever I had sensed wasn't anything supernatural.
I reached for the door but turned back to see the street lantern again and it was in another place now. There was a white van heading toward the area outside the line of trees and I followed along on the sidewalks next to the newly made concrete ditches that lead to a circular platform where a flagpole stood. I looked up and noted that I was still in America. The presence I had felt before had returned and I ran back toward the house and back door. I couldn't reach the balcony because it seemed higher. The white van disappeared off into the night. The license tag was only one letter. I thought it was odd.
The presence had taken dominance over the platform with the flag but the house changed and made itself difficult to enter. The presence was evil but I remained hidden and safe all the same.
"These sliding doors don't have any screens, do they?" I asked. Then I heard a muffled yes. I stood on a balcony where there was a lush green lawn before me. It was a backyard that lead to a line of shrub and tree in the short distance away. The evening was peaceful, and the warmth felt nice. The dullness was welcomed. There was a porch but the brick and stone structure made it seem like a grand balcony that overlooked a secluded yard that was located near the hilltops of some small wooded locale. The only light emitted from a nearby street lantern located near the back dim porch light.
Dusk was just setting in. There was no one in the yard. I seemed to be on watch. I could smell the salty air. The sea was nearby only a few miles away. I faintly recall the moonlight upon the surface of dark water. I stood there and looked out. Something was in the woods. I fell quiet so that even my breathing could not be detected. I waited.
I could hear the ticking of a clock somewhere from inside the house. Something was heading for the house. Others in the house were oblivious to any sense of movement outside. I saw the shadows come out from the green that by now had turned shapeless in the coming night.
A darkness proceeded with no retreat. I turned toward the sliding doors and the screen was blocking me from the inside. I was going to try to lock the door behind me and step out another door to watch whatever it was, like a guardian. I wanted to keep it away. I was doing rather well as I hadn't been detected. Then someone else inside the house slowly slid the door then left the door slightly open. I stood there hiding beside the porch still looking out at the dark shade of the nearby trees, and never really seen anything move or attack, but I felt its presence.
The night hours seemed unnaturally long. I almost forgot and walked back to the door. The humming of a transformer droned on. No electricity was failing, so I knew whatever I had sensed wasn't anything supernatural.
I reached for the door but turned back to see the street lantern again and it was in another place now. There was a white van heading toward the area outside the line of trees and I followed along on the sidewalks next to the newly made concrete ditches that lead to a circular platform where a flagpole stood. I looked up and noted that I was still in America. The presence I had felt before had returned and I ran back toward the house and back door. I couldn't reach the balcony because it seemed higher. The white van disappeared off into the night. The license tag was only one letter. I thought it was odd.
The presence had taken dominance over the platform with the flag but the house changed and made itself difficult to enter. The presence was evil but I remained hidden and safe all the same.
Sunday, July 12, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 8
Dwelling Before An Evil Fortress
The sky was a pinkish color as if a storm had been coming. A foggy light kind of afterglow in light hues of pale rose hung overhead. I looked up and then absently back down to the tame landscape that surrounded me. Here and there were shrubs and trees, and other foliage. The trees were dead and blackened, but somehow they seemed as a shelter for the smooth mossy ground below their thick branches. The ground was completely even as a marble floor might have been. The branches never moved with the wind, the charred-black color of them seemed to give off a high gloss of moisture that had clung to the dry bark like large, suspended raindrops until they were absorbed into the bark itself to keep a glossy appearance.
Amid this was a little glass structure, like a greenhouse. I lived there. Inside I had furniture and old lamps and rugs. I'd sit and read and do everyday things. In the open, surrounded by tainted glass and the ever warm atmosphere all around me inside and outside. I went inside to rest. I knew I couldn't be seen but I could see far enough away, through the trees, through the eerie forest-like realm, the dark fortress that lay on its borders. To me, it had always seemed like a fortress. Giving thought to the amount of time I must have been here as I had in some strange way grown accustomed to it and that it was part of the world I inhabited. I knew not of the length of time I was in this realm. It seemed years in this frame but as always, only hours had passed. I was somewhere I had been before but I had no prior recollection. Time was not measured here though.
I sighed. I opened the thick wooden door and went back outside. When inside, the clouds seemed to envelope the small dwelling and all around it. And when looking up, a full moon shown as hazy light that never moved and was best seen in the center of a clearing encircled by trees. As I walked further through the trees I found that the shadowy structure was indeed a fortress. It seemed empty. Abandoned. I heard something from inside. At first an echo and then a loud clanging as if something heavy had fallen from a great height from inside barren walls.
I fled to another side of the fortress and stood upon the balcony of its front structure.
"How. . .did I get here?" I asked myself, and ducked down. I looked around and saw an old garden path that lead to what appeared to be an empty pond, and beyond that, a lone wall as if it was merely built as an obstacle against the wind. At the front there was a dark passageway. I looked up again. The same sky hung overhead. It was night. I looked at the windows of the fortress and peered inside. The windows having a clear glass and framing in sections in modern day style. But the walls of stone were of a long ago era. A time when castles were built. More noises emitted from inside but there was nothing there. No life force of any kind. It was as if the sounds were mute to all else, unknowing to any sense of fear or any outside presence whatsoever.
I sat on a fallen stone that was against the outer wall and must have toppled from the roof, from some past earthquake or strong winds. I felt that within the fortress there was finally nothing evermore to heed. I stood up and shuttered because somehow I remembered that's how gateways were opened and used. When there was no guard. I began to move away and the gravity of the grounds on which I moved, they pulled heavier, so I moved slower. I broke free of the pull when I focused on and connected with the moon, and at a quicker pace I ran back into the forest. I was free of the grip of the fortress grounds. There was something evil there.
I headed back to my hidden abode.
Circa 1996
Because of the vivid imagery of this dream, and how clear and lucid it was, I had written a poem (1998) and a song lyric (2016) dedicated to this one dream.
The sky was a pinkish color as if a storm had been coming. A foggy light kind of afterglow in light hues of pale rose hung overhead. I looked up and then absently back down to the tame landscape that surrounded me. Here and there were shrubs and trees, and other foliage. The trees were dead and blackened, but somehow they seemed as a shelter for the smooth mossy ground below their thick branches. The ground was completely even as a marble floor might have been. The branches never moved with the wind, the charred-black color of them seemed to give off a high gloss of moisture that had clung to the dry bark like large, suspended raindrops until they were absorbed into the bark itself to keep a glossy appearance.
Amid this was a little glass structure, like a greenhouse. I lived there. Inside I had furniture and old lamps and rugs. I'd sit and read and do everyday things. In the open, surrounded by tainted glass and the ever warm atmosphere all around me inside and outside. I went inside to rest. I knew I couldn't be seen but I could see far enough away, through the trees, through the eerie forest-like realm, the dark fortress that lay on its borders. To me, it had always seemed like a fortress. Giving thought to the amount of time I must have been here as I had in some strange way grown accustomed to it and that it was part of the world I inhabited. I knew not of the length of time I was in this realm. It seemed years in this frame but as always, only hours had passed. I was somewhere I had been before but I had no prior recollection. Time was not measured here though.
I sighed. I opened the thick wooden door and went back outside. When inside, the clouds seemed to envelope the small dwelling and all around it. And when looking up, a full moon shown as hazy light that never moved and was best seen in the center of a clearing encircled by trees. As I walked further through the trees I found that the shadowy structure was indeed a fortress. It seemed empty. Abandoned. I heard something from inside. At first an echo and then a loud clanging as if something heavy had fallen from a great height from inside barren walls.
I fled to another side of the fortress and stood upon the balcony of its front structure.
"How. . .did I get here?" I asked myself, and ducked down. I looked around and saw an old garden path that lead to what appeared to be an empty pond, and beyond that, a lone wall as if it was merely built as an obstacle against the wind. At the front there was a dark passageway. I looked up again. The same sky hung overhead. It was night. I looked at the windows of the fortress and peered inside. The windows having a clear glass and framing in sections in modern day style. But the walls of stone were of a long ago era. A time when castles were built. More noises emitted from inside but there was nothing there. No life force of any kind. It was as if the sounds were mute to all else, unknowing to any sense of fear or any outside presence whatsoever.
I sat on a fallen stone that was against the outer wall and must have toppled from the roof, from some past earthquake or strong winds. I felt that within the fortress there was finally nothing evermore to heed. I stood up and shuttered because somehow I remembered that's how gateways were opened and used. When there was no guard. I began to move away and the gravity of the grounds on which I moved, they pulled heavier, so I moved slower. I broke free of the pull when I focused on and connected with the moon, and at a quicker pace I ran back into the forest. I was free of the grip of the fortress grounds. There was something evil there.
I headed back to my hidden abode.
Circa 1996
Because of the vivid imagery of this dream, and how clear and lucid it was, I had written a poem (1998) and a song lyric (2016) dedicated to this one dream.
Saturday, July 11, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 9
The Stairs Beyond The Basement (Green Basement)
Dimly the greenish pale walls came into view. The room was small and rather cozy in a quiet, foreboding way. I thought I was standing alone just looking around at the smallish furniture and pillows. The room itself was like a little cubby hole built into a finished basement, fully carpeted, green shag, walls painted all green in streaks with different shades of green as I adjusted my eyes. This was very familiar, but I'd never been in this room before.
We sat down and began to chat about toys, presents and music. The colors about the top of the room were darker than the highlights of green like frost on the pines that stroked down towards the baseboards. Thick green pillows provided more seating in two of the corners. I sat there still, looking at the wall curiously.
I noticed there was a small doorway, not a big, gaping door, but a very small square-like frame leading to a dark set of stairs. Just a very tiny doorway that was built into the wall. Almost undetectable, save for the hair-thin lines. I looked around, the others were playing games and laughing. I casually mentioned that there was a door in the wall and asked if they had ever noticed it before.
The answer was a stunned No...! And they stared directly at it.
"I thought it was just another wall." said Lucy.
"No wait, it may not even open!" Rachel said backing away.
"But there's still an unexplored room in the house, don't you want to know where it leads to? Do we avoid it or find out if there's a monster behind it?" I said. "We'll never know what the door's secret is, unless somebody opens that door."
The rest gathered behind me, peering over my shoulders. I slowly opened the door, turning the tiny knob that was only a foot above the floor. The door itself was about two feet in height and two foot in width. Standing straight up again I said, "There, you see, there is a room in here." The others moved back and stared straight into the opened passageway. I thought for a moment that they were scared. But they stayed there looking on.
Everyone suddenly gathered round the opened doorway and peered inside. I looked deep into the darkness, and far, far away I saw a faint glow.
Oddly, there was so much darkness between the opened doorway and the faint glow that it seemed light years away in a terrible black void. It was stunning and coldly stark at the same time. I thought; What's this gate that leads to outer space? What's it doing in here?
"Well, I'm not going in there first." Lucy stated.
"Na-uh, me either." Rachel said.
I looked straining my eyes to see what the light was made of afar off. It looked as though it was the sun, and that we were in a doorway very far from it.
I felt around for a solid footing while bracing the edges of the small open doorway. There were stairs. I stepped through and a cold, freezing air brushed lightly up against me. The others followed behind me, but one by one, they started to pause in their advancement and I saw them turn back. Fear had won over them. They could not make this journey.
"Dipshits." I muttered. I knew they were too afraid to seek further into this new and rather expanded room. My reasoning was, of course, to keep looking. I called after them but it was of no use, the only thing I could see now was the doorway several yards behind me, a dark void in front of me, and the glow way ahead of me.
Then walking on a level floor slowly, knowing they were all still next to the doorway being chicken, I stepped down suddenly and felt with my foot a stair that descended. I began to walk down the stairs. The cold was beginning to flow upward. Beyond the large, black room that I crossed I stopped for a moment to put up my hand and strangely the far off light signaled to me. I continued. Had it been so hard and bitter I'd have turned back. I looked back and I still saw the faintest sparkle from what I knew was the now far-off little square door of the green basement.
"Well this sucks." I said into the darkness.
"You are the fire and flame here." I heard a voice say, it startled the hell out of me. Shaking off the cold, I headed further.
Dimly the greenish pale walls came into view. The room was small and rather cozy in a quiet, foreboding way. I thought I was standing alone just looking around at the smallish furniture and pillows. The room itself was like a little cubby hole built into a finished basement, fully carpeted, green shag, walls painted all green in streaks with different shades of green as I adjusted my eyes. This was very familiar, but I'd never been in this room before.
We sat down and began to chat about toys, presents and music. The colors about the top of the room were darker than the highlights of green like frost on the pines that stroked down towards the baseboards. Thick green pillows provided more seating in two of the corners. I sat there still, looking at the wall curiously.
I noticed there was a small doorway, not a big, gaping door, but a very small square-like frame leading to a dark set of stairs. Just a very tiny doorway that was built into the wall. Almost undetectable, save for the hair-thin lines. I looked around, the others were playing games and laughing. I casually mentioned that there was a door in the wall and asked if they had ever noticed it before.
The answer was a stunned No...! And they stared directly at it.
"I thought it was just another wall." said Lucy.
"No wait, it may not even open!" Rachel said backing away.
"But there's still an unexplored room in the house, don't you want to know where it leads to? Do we avoid it or find out if there's a monster behind it?" I said. "We'll never know what the door's secret is, unless somebody opens that door."
The rest gathered behind me, peering over my shoulders. I slowly opened the door, turning the tiny knob that was only a foot above the floor. The door itself was about two feet in height and two foot in width. Standing straight up again I said, "There, you see, there is a room in here." The others moved back and stared straight into the opened passageway. I thought for a moment that they were scared. But they stayed there looking on.
Everyone suddenly gathered round the opened doorway and peered inside. I looked deep into the darkness, and far, far away I saw a faint glow.
Oddly, there was so much darkness between the opened doorway and the faint glow that it seemed light years away in a terrible black void. It was stunning and coldly stark at the same time. I thought; What's this gate that leads to outer space? What's it doing in here?
"Well, I'm not going in there first." Lucy stated.
"Na-uh, me either." Rachel said.
I looked straining my eyes to see what the light was made of afar off. It looked as though it was the sun, and that we were in a doorway very far from it.
I felt around for a solid footing while bracing the edges of the small open doorway. There were stairs. I stepped through and a cold, freezing air brushed lightly up against me. The others followed behind me, but one by one, they started to pause in their advancement and I saw them turn back. Fear had won over them. They could not make this journey.
"Dipshits." I muttered. I knew they were too afraid to seek further into this new and rather expanded room. My reasoning was, of course, to keep looking. I called after them but it was of no use, the only thing I could see now was the doorway several yards behind me, a dark void in front of me, and the glow way ahead of me.
Then walking on a level floor slowly, knowing they were all still next to the doorway being chicken, I stepped down suddenly and felt with my foot a stair that descended. I began to walk down the stairs. The cold was beginning to flow upward. Beyond the large, black room that I crossed I stopped for a moment to put up my hand and strangely the far off light signaled to me. I continued. Had it been so hard and bitter I'd have turned back. I looked back and I still saw the faintest sparkle from what I knew was the now far-off little square door of the green basement.
"Well this sucks." I said into the darkness.
"You are the fire and flame here." I heard a voice say, it startled the hell out of me. Shaking off the cold, I headed further.
Friday, July 10, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 10
The Black Tower Of The Black Desert
How deep and severe those stress levels ran. The effect of the servants of the dark had on everyone. Did they have any other plans? A long-robed spectre came into view. Of course they did, and I knew it. They just had this flair for being unglued about imagined towering mountains that had to be climbed within seconds, as they'd emerged right up in front of them. It was all an effect to send out to various targets. To stun, and cause feelings of urgency.
I was lowering my words to almost a whisper. Low vibrations pitched out in a perfect flow. The frequencies of my voice were mastered. I was going to deliver a deathly blow to the power their darkness had. I knew I could speak softly and it would still strike like an arrow. I knew the words but the apparition disappeared behind someone before I could speak them. I felt a nervous, cold anxiety creeping up as the now reappeared form shook rapidly with a wind that I could not even feel. He turned into a grinning desert land-monster and sunk down into a pool of quicksand. I thought that was an asshole thing of him to do. My anxiety disappeared. I walked away and off to this place. I wasn't following anything, but I was determined to see if the area of the quicksand lead anywhere else.
The torpid stiffness of the ground creaked beneath my feet. This was a dead world. A dead planet. Nothing grew here. Was this an earth of the spectre's past? A long pathway of dried, cracked ground lined with pebbles and small stones went along like highways. I was deep within another realm. I walked on and wondered what direction I had come from as I looked all around me. The whole area turned black as the deepest midnight. Dark as if all light had never been shed and the appearance of it was like a gaping hole had all but swallowed the place itself. I focused, and emitted light drawn from horizons I knew were there.
It sprawled before me like a heavy passage force-field that was pulled open by a force from behind me. I moved out of the passage and walked with the wind and it began to slow and then finally cease to a small breeze. I looked around. What I saw was the most horrible, despairing landscape I had ever seen. I'd never seen anything like this before.
I felt perhaps it was named 'Bottomside' as opposed to 'Topside'. So I had a name for it. It seemed to fit.
The area was rounded, closed in by large black hills surrounding it. The entire ground was charred black as if a great, all consuming fire had burned it and left even the layers underneath to total destruction. All about the lifeless grounds flat stones here and there were strewn. There were some dead withered branches lying about, sparse driftwood that seemed to blend so well with the dull landscape that one had to be looking right at them to see them.
My eyes adjusted. A few flames, like small campfires lit the whole area in an eerie glow. Only detected once in range. In the middle of this hellish realm there stood a menacing, tall black tower. The base of the tower was empty, a structure barely standing. The sole support of the structure was that of four rounded sides which arched over the barren ground inside, and resembled more that of an empty silo rather than an ancient tower. Seeming more like an open guardhouse that was gutted. From far away it looked to be a dread tower of darkness. Yet up close it was the very essence of nothing. There was nothing there.
I walked closer, toward the tower. "Frodo?" then I thought for a moment. "Wait a minute, why am I calling for Frodo? He got out of this place a long time ago."
I came to the outer walls of the tower, I studied the outside fading bricks and saw that it was not as it appeared to be. Maybe three, four floors, instead of eight or more as it had looked from the distance. Looking inside the tower I saw that there was a fire in the dead center, encircled with a strange assortment of wedged-in stones in the ground. An ancient watch tower it seemed now. The unfriendly atmosphere now took on an eerie glow from within its base and I felt warm and feverish. A feeling of long ago death was so thick in the air that I choked and wondered if I really stood in the midst of what was possibly Mordor. I stood still for awhile and just listened. It was neither warm or cold. No temperature. So still, so uneasily calm and I felt no presence of anything, good or evil. That felt worse, somehow. Nothing to fight for or fight from. I took it all in stride.
I went to the center of this tower and looked around. Nothing. I looked up and at first it seemed that there was a ceiling. Then I looked into the fire once more. It was slowly burning. Almost suspended in some repetitive way. I looked up again, all I saw was a hollowed out, black withering tower clear up to its rafters. It was abandoned thousands of years ago. The bricks that were built of it were so deformed with time that they appeared to be only dissolved pieces of rock. It was the strangest decay as the lacking elements made it last longer.
I saw a winged demon beast as it flew across the sky. Its whole being was more like a canopy of dust. As if it was a lost air pocket searching for its altitude. I watched it fly behind the mountain, yet still could not bring myself to feel fear, because there was no feeling of anything to be feared.
Then I felt a wind, then it turned to a small breeze. So I knew there was something of an airy domain to this godforsaken place. I looked out towards the direction I had come, and where I had came through, the area was no longer there. I was enclosed in this place that was an infinite desert in a strange night's darkness, alone. I closed my eyes and thought I should wake, but, there was a small breeze indicating some kind of life was still lingering. The breeze I felt now had died down for long eons along with everything else before I had even entered this hellish realm. But here it came to me, to move with me. I looked back up at the upmost flimsy ceiling of the tower, the roof was almost as dissolved as the bricks that supported the beams were close to the point of crumbling. Suddenly a horrible voice spoke out from the darkness and I went to the inner wall's archway on the south and stared outwards. Neither did it comfort or frighten me.
"They've all been here and now they're part of the withered stones before you!" the voice boomed in my ears and shattered the breeze. The demonic voice pierced through the deserted landscape. I went to another archway and looked out, there was nothing. The various angles of mountains peaked in upward formations as sharp as blunted giant spades. I watched and listened. The air, the atmosphere, and even my heartbeat hadn't changed, or flinched at this demon's voice. I looked back at the fire and just sensed a scene to some ancient past. Other than that, nothing could be focused on by me. I had no attentive aim to give anything else as I surveyed everything that was literally nothing, all around me.
I noticed that in and around the fire there were grey fragments of cloth, possibly garments, but so old and so aged with time that even touching them they would fall apart. I looked back to the outer area around the black tower. I saw nothing. I didn't expect to either. I studied the tower itself, looking over it up and down. The tower had been burnt and still covered with flaking ashes from the fire left burning for time to do the rest of its demise.
"What do you mean they're all part of the withered stones?" I said to the darkness and then softly to the fire, "Why would they be here?"
"You'll never see them again! They are dead here!" The demon's voice boomed louder this time and it almost shook me. But at the same time, this dead zone of a place made me as catatonic as it was. It just didn't phase me.
"Good. Does that mean you have nothing to torment now, oh demon? You've deceived them when they didn't know what you were." I answered back.
"They have no power to deliver torment to demons!" the dark voice returned. Somehow I felt the frivolous entity had no idea what I said, or simply misunderstood it.
"How are they dead? How did they die?"
Laughing, the demon said "Look on their garments they no longer wear!" Suddenly I saw an arm like a smokey, paper-thin formation point to the center of the fire. It startled me a little. Then I looked in the fire and saw no change although I could see the grey fragments a bit clearer. They seemed like garments. The ghostly arm that had extended through one of the arches of the tower, quickly snapped back out. I also noted that my question was not answered, so whatever death had happened, the demonic entity had no clue about it.
"Those rags are thousands of years old, you dumbshit! Come on! You can do better than that!" I said to the disembodied demon.
"Dead! And they died right here, right before you came here! Time passes like that here in this place! You've been on a long road." The mocking demonic voice was cruel and yet spoke with soft tones and it was almost soothing. It could not move me to be afraid or subdued.
I stared into the fire and then focused on the wretched walls within the tower. I stared at the scorched landscape and actually considered the demon to be background noise. Something that was just annoying, like a TV commercial being too loud. I hadn't been here all that long, but I'd been here longer than I had been on the road to this infernal realm. There was silence.
"So what do you want me to do about it? Them being dead, that is?" I mocked the demon again and there was a dead silence. I began to walk away from the tower and laughed at the demon, or whatever it was.
"You cannot leave here!" the demon's voice shattered the silence and I casually stopped to look in the direction of the tower. "Sure I can! I can leave anytime I want. I'm dead too, and I came here to find somebody and, of course, they just died so they'll be no company. I came to gather their otherworldly belongings, but since they were lost in the thousand years prior to now, and nobody's here. . .then. . .see ya!"
I walked further onward. I continued. By then I had walked a long way and the tower was but a small structure in the distance. Despite my feeling of terror starting to come back, I was still amused at how easy it was to walk away from that nightmarish and surreal tower. "What an ugly piece of shit!" I thought. With one last misguided effort, the demon voice squealed after me from the tower. I saw that it was now standing in the base of the tower looking out toward me. I felt a little unnerved that I had been standing where the demon now stood. Explaining the feeling of terror that started to come back. I spoke in a taunting voice and said; "The ones you really wanted were never here!" I walked a few more steps and unleashed a last mocking goodbye. "They that were here, they have a message for you. Well it's like this, they say FUCK YOU!"
The last look I gave toward the tower, I noticed that the ground was now a sandy color, and a bit more light was actually covering the landscape. There was now a continuous breeze.
I continued onward and found myself outside that horrible charred, blackened desert with the withered old dark monstrosity of a burnt ruin. I felt a chilly breeze and the darkness took on a more earthly night hour. Something more normal. I passed by an old pirate ship that sunk and washed ashore. It was dark inside and I saw no one within. My small family wasn't there either, but I felt their presence there, that they were still alive but not in the way I remembered.
How deep and severe those stress levels ran. The effect of the servants of the dark had on everyone. Did they have any other plans? A long-robed spectre came into view. Of course they did, and I knew it. They just had this flair for being unglued about imagined towering mountains that had to be climbed within seconds, as they'd emerged right up in front of them. It was all an effect to send out to various targets. To stun, and cause feelings of urgency.
I was lowering my words to almost a whisper. Low vibrations pitched out in a perfect flow. The frequencies of my voice were mastered. I was going to deliver a deathly blow to the power their darkness had. I knew I could speak softly and it would still strike like an arrow. I knew the words but the apparition disappeared behind someone before I could speak them. I felt a nervous, cold anxiety creeping up as the now reappeared form shook rapidly with a wind that I could not even feel. He turned into a grinning desert land-monster and sunk down into a pool of quicksand. I thought that was an asshole thing of him to do. My anxiety disappeared. I walked away and off to this place. I wasn't following anything, but I was determined to see if the area of the quicksand lead anywhere else.
The torpid stiffness of the ground creaked beneath my feet. This was a dead world. A dead planet. Nothing grew here. Was this an earth of the spectre's past? A long pathway of dried, cracked ground lined with pebbles and small stones went along like highways. I was deep within another realm. I walked on and wondered what direction I had come from as I looked all around me. The whole area turned black as the deepest midnight. Dark as if all light had never been shed and the appearance of it was like a gaping hole had all but swallowed the place itself. I focused, and emitted light drawn from horizons I knew were there.
It sprawled before me like a heavy passage force-field that was pulled open by a force from behind me. I moved out of the passage and walked with the wind and it began to slow and then finally cease to a small breeze. I looked around. What I saw was the most horrible, despairing landscape I had ever seen. I'd never seen anything like this before.
I felt perhaps it was named 'Bottomside' as opposed to 'Topside'. So I had a name for it. It seemed to fit.
The area was rounded, closed in by large black hills surrounding it. The entire ground was charred black as if a great, all consuming fire had burned it and left even the layers underneath to total destruction. All about the lifeless grounds flat stones here and there were strewn. There were some dead withered branches lying about, sparse driftwood that seemed to blend so well with the dull landscape that one had to be looking right at them to see them.
My eyes adjusted. A few flames, like small campfires lit the whole area in an eerie glow. Only detected once in range. In the middle of this hellish realm there stood a menacing, tall black tower. The base of the tower was empty, a structure barely standing. The sole support of the structure was that of four rounded sides which arched over the barren ground inside, and resembled more that of an empty silo rather than an ancient tower. Seeming more like an open guardhouse that was gutted. From far away it looked to be a dread tower of darkness. Yet up close it was the very essence of nothing. There was nothing there.
I walked closer, toward the tower. "Frodo?" then I thought for a moment. "Wait a minute, why am I calling for Frodo? He got out of this place a long time ago."
I came to the outer walls of the tower, I studied the outside fading bricks and saw that it was not as it appeared to be. Maybe three, four floors, instead of eight or more as it had looked from the distance. Looking inside the tower I saw that there was a fire in the dead center, encircled with a strange assortment of wedged-in stones in the ground. An ancient watch tower it seemed now. The unfriendly atmosphere now took on an eerie glow from within its base and I felt warm and feverish. A feeling of long ago death was so thick in the air that I choked and wondered if I really stood in the midst of what was possibly Mordor. I stood still for awhile and just listened. It was neither warm or cold. No temperature. So still, so uneasily calm and I felt no presence of anything, good or evil. That felt worse, somehow. Nothing to fight for or fight from. I took it all in stride.
I went to the center of this tower and looked around. Nothing. I looked up and at first it seemed that there was a ceiling. Then I looked into the fire once more. It was slowly burning. Almost suspended in some repetitive way. I looked up again, all I saw was a hollowed out, black withering tower clear up to its rafters. It was abandoned thousands of years ago. The bricks that were built of it were so deformed with time that they appeared to be only dissolved pieces of rock. It was the strangest decay as the lacking elements made it last longer.
I saw a winged demon beast as it flew across the sky. Its whole being was more like a canopy of dust. As if it was a lost air pocket searching for its altitude. I watched it fly behind the mountain, yet still could not bring myself to feel fear, because there was no feeling of anything to be feared.
Then I felt a wind, then it turned to a small breeze. So I knew there was something of an airy domain to this godforsaken place. I looked out towards the direction I had come, and where I had came through, the area was no longer there. I was enclosed in this place that was an infinite desert in a strange night's darkness, alone. I closed my eyes and thought I should wake, but, there was a small breeze indicating some kind of life was still lingering. The breeze I felt now had died down for long eons along with everything else before I had even entered this hellish realm. But here it came to me, to move with me. I looked back up at the upmost flimsy ceiling of the tower, the roof was almost as dissolved as the bricks that supported the beams were close to the point of crumbling. Suddenly a horrible voice spoke out from the darkness and I went to the inner wall's archway on the south and stared outwards. Neither did it comfort or frighten me.
"They've all been here and now they're part of the withered stones before you!" the voice boomed in my ears and shattered the breeze. The demonic voice pierced through the deserted landscape. I went to another archway and looked out, there was nothing. The various angles of mountains peaked in upward formations as sharp as blunted giant spades. I watched and listened. The air, the atmosphere, and even my heartbeat hadn't changed, or flinched at this demon's voice. I looked back at the fire and just sensed a scene to some ancient past. Other than that, nothing could be focused on by me. I had no attentive aim to give anything else as I surveyed everything that was literally nothing, all around me.
I noticed that in and around the fire there were grey fragments of cloth, possibly garments, but so old and so aged with time that even touching them they would fall apart. I looked back to the outer area around the black tower. I saw nothing. I didn't expect to either. I studied the tower itself, looking over it up and down. The tower had been burnt and still covered with flaking ashes from the fire left burning for time to do the rest of its demise.
"What do you mean they're all part of the withered stones?" I said to the darkness and then softly to the fire, "Why would they be here?"
"You'll never see them again! They are dead here!" The demon's voice boomed louder this time and it almost shook me. But at the same time, this dead zone of a place made me as catatonic as it was. It just didn't phase me.
"Good. Does that mean you have nothing to torment now, oh demon? You've deceived them when they didn't know what you were." I answered back.
"They have no power to deliver torment to demons!" the dark voice returned. Somehow I felt the frivolous entity had no idea what I said, or simply misunderstood it.
"How are they dead? How did they die?"
Laughing, the demon said "Look on their garments they no longer wear!" Suddenly I saw an arm like a smokey, paper-thin formation point to the center of the fire. It startled me a little. Then I looked in the fire and saw no change although I could see the grey fragments a bit clearer. They seemed like garments. The ghostly arm that had extended through one of the arches of the tower, quickly snapped back out. I also noted that my question was not answered, so whatever death had happened, the demonic entity had no clue about it.
"Those rags are thousands of years old, you dumbshit! Come on! You can do better than that!" I said to the disembodied demon.
"Dead! And they died right here, right before you came here! Time passes like that here in this place! You've been on a long road." The mocking demonic voice was cruel and yet spoke with soft tones and it was almost soothing. It could not move me to be afraid or subdued.
I stared into the fire and then focused on the wretched walls within the tower. I stared at the scorched landscape and actually considered the demon to be background noise. Something that was just annoying, like a TV commercial being too loud. I hadn't been here all that long, but I'd been here longer than I had been on the road to this infernal realm. There was silence.
"So what do you want me to do about it? Them being dead, that is?" I mocked the demon again and there was a dead silence. I began to walk away from the tower and laughed at the demon, or whatever it was.
"You cannot leave here!" the demon's voice shattered the silence and I casually stopped to look in the direction of the tower. "Sure I can! I can leave anytime I want. I'm dead too, and I came here to find somebody and, of course, they just died so they'll be no company. I came to gather their otherworldly belongings, but since they were lost in the thousand years prior to now, and nobody's here. . .then. . .see ya!"
I walked further onward. I continued. By then I had walked a long way and the tower was but a small structure in the distance. Despite my feeling of terror starting to come back, I was still amused at how easy it was to walk away from that nightmarish and surreal tower. "What an ugly piece of shit!" I thought. With one last misguided effort, the demon voice squealed after me from the tower. I saw that it was now standing in the base of the tower looking out toward me. I felt a little unnerved that I had been standing where the demon now stood. Explaining the feeling of terror that started to come back. I spoke in a taunting voice and said; "The ones you really wanted were never here!" I walked a few more steps and unleashed a last mocking goodbye. "They that were here, they have a message for you. Well it's like this, they say FUCK YOU!"
The last look I gave toward the tower, I noticed that the ground was now a sandy color, and a bit more light was actually covering the landscape. There was now a continuous breeze.
I continued onward and found myself outside that horrible charred, blackened desert with the withered old dark monstrosity of a burnt ruin. I felt a chilly breeze and the darkness took on a more earthly night hour. Something more normal. I passed by an old pirate ship that sunk and washed ashore. It was dark inside and I saw no one within. My small family wasn't there either, but I felt their presence there, that they were still alive but not in the way I remembered.
Thursday, July 9, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 11
Airplane Anxiety
A reoccurring dream I recall has an eerie end that is always right at a critical point. I can relate certain 'same dream' episodes in the way one might return to the same exact place, but the dream pattern being a little different as to the way one might approach the place in that dream. However the end and everything leading up to the end is exactly the same. I only have a very limited number of exact reoccurring dreams, and the few that are have almost always involved either airplanes, traveling, or roadways that lead in unusually angled turns and degrees. Like a maze or a multitude of obstacles.
There are several dreams where I'm going onto an airplane, and always the air pressure inside of any airplane I board is very tight and I feel as though I'm being crushed by so much atmosphere. It's really bizarre but I cannot travel the way of airplanes in dreams. It's much faster and easier without them. But in some dreams I cannot go to certain places without them and it's only something in my psyche that's left over from how things work in the waking world.
But this dream is the one that has the same ending and the last time I dreamt this it was nearing the winter of 1997.
I was trying to get through the airport and I was trying to sneak onto a plane because someone was following me. A murderer, or an agent or spy. Moments passed. I was sitting in the window seat and felt as if though I had been forced onto the plane and wondered if I should get out now. Having no idea where I was going, I stayed in the tiny seat as it seemed safe there for the moment. Everyone else on the somewhat crowded plane didn't know I was there, they couldn't even see me. But I was there.
I looked around and everyone was carrying on, reading magazines, talking and laughing. I looked up at the ceiling and I had this horrible dread. I didn't know what it was and I wasn't sure if it even had anything to do with the airplane. But I felt my stomach tying into knots and I was breaking out in a cold sweat.
I looked around at everyone again and now they're all alert! About what, I didn't know, but something had them spooked. For a tense moment there was dread silence and then they all relaxed and went back to what they were doing. The pilot announced that we'd be landing soon. I knew that wherever it was, we'd be landing and it wasn't the right place. I thought lay-over. The plane started to descend and I looked out the window. There was a city down below that seemed like someplace in the mid-country for the green fields all around the distant runway.
There were big, luxurious hotels here and there. The city seemed clean and rich. There were 15-16 floor apartment buildings and there were various white puffs of cloud in the sky above them. One particular apartment building had a white roof and was built in the shape of a hexagon, with balconies on each floor and on each side of the structure.
The plane began to descend lower and lower, almost so close to the tops of all the buildings that it must have roared to the people in them. I knew something was wrong, but couldn't do anything. It was either the place to be landing or something else that I couldn't imagine at the moment, but just when the sense of that horrible dread deepened, and there was an answer fast approaching, I would always awake.
Three times this dream I've had. It always ended right before the plane landed wherever it was going to land. But I knew it wasn't the runway.
A reoccurring dream I recall has an eerie end that is always right at a critical point. I can relate certain 'same dream' episodes in the way one might return to the same exact place, but the dream pattern being a little different as to the way one might approach the place in that dream. However the end and everything leading up to the end is exactly the same. I only have a very limited number of exact reoccurring dreams, and the few that are have almost always involved either airplanes, traveling, or roadways that lead in unusually angled turns and degrees. Like a maze or a multitude of obstacles.
There are several dreams where I'm going onto an airplane, and always the air pressure inside of any airplane I board is very tight and I feel as though I'm being crushed by so much atmosphere. It's really bizarre but I cannot travel the way of airplanes in dreams. It's much faster and easier without them. But in some dreams I cannot go to certain places without them and it's only something in my psyche that's left over from how things work in the waking world.
But this dream is the one that has the same ending and the last time I dreamt this it was nearing the winter of 1997.
I was trying to get through the airport and I was trying to sneak onto a plane because someone was following me. A murderer, or an agent or spy. Moments passed. I was sitting in the window seat and felt as if though I had been forced onto the plane and wondered if I should get out now. Having no idea where I was going, I stayed in the tiny seat as it seemed safe there for the moment. Everyone else on the somewhat crowded plane didn't know I was there, they couldn't even see me. But I was there.
I looked around and everyone was carrying on, reading magazines, talking and laughing. I looked up at the ceiling and I had this horrible dread. I didn't know what it was and I wasn't sure if it even had anything to do with the airplane. But I felt my stomach tying into knots and I was breaking out in a cold sweat.
I looked around at everyone again and now they're all alert! About what, I didn't know, but something had them spooked. For a tense moment there was dread silence and then they all relaxed and went back to what they were doing. The pilot announced that we'd be landing soon. I knew that wherever it was, we'd be landing and it wasn't the right place. I thought lay-over. The plane started to descend and I looked out the window. There was a city down below that seemed like someplace in the mid-country for the green fields all around the distant runway.
There were big, luxurious hotels here and there. The city seemed clean and rich. There were 15-16 floor apartment buildings and there were various white puffs of cloud in the sky above them. One particular apartment building had a white roof and was built in the shape of a hexagon, with balconies on each floor and on each side of the structure.
The plane began to descend lower and lower, almost so close to the tops of all the buildings that it must have roared to the people in them. I knew something was wrong, but couldn't do anything. It was either the place to be landing or something else that I couldn't imagine at the moment, but just when the sense of that horrible dread deepened, and there was an answer fast approaching, I would always awake.
Three times this dream I've had. It always ended right before the plane landed wherever it was going to land. But I knew it wasn't the runway.
Wednesday, July 8, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 12
Crumbling Churches
I stood in what seemed like the concession stand at a movie theater. I went through the doors, and it was dark with very little light, with the usual row of chairs and draped walls that a theater would have. In front of all the seats, there was a stage, not a screen. I thought I was alone. I turned around to look at the place, but I wasn't alone and there were people all about the place. Half the seats were empty, while the other half, scattered here and there, people sat as if awaiting a movie to start. On the stage were long, silken drapes of gold, yellow, and white. There was a choir on stage and they were humming while someone was talking to the people in the audience. The talker seemed to be sly, covert, and full of cunning. All the walls changed and were decorated with bright, glaring images of crosses. Of people from a long time ago and statues of angels with trumpets and harps. The choir was singing now. I had taken notice, and they were singing apparently like they were before I had come in, and I stopped at a chair and looked on.
I was trying to be unnoticed. As I watched them singing, it seemed they weren't singing any 'words' and they were, I could almost swear, 'chanting' and their faces and chants were empty. There was nothing there. Their smiles were like grins of menace. I slinked down the aisle towards the exit sign. Like all movie theaters, this church had an exit door that was located somewhere near the side of the stage. A door that one had to make their way past all the seats to get to. I walked purposefully in a 'I'm supposed to be going this way, don't pay any attention to me' attitude. I reached the exit doors.
As I tried to open them they seemed to be locked, but then the knob budged a little and I knew it wasn't bolted. I sensed that a strong wind outside was blowing up against the sides of the building. That was what must have been making the door resist. The situation was now that it was a simple storm that gave me the impression that I may have been locked inside. I pushed the door very hard and found myself in a small little foyer that had a flapping canvas covering the passage to the outside. I felt a tremendous gust of wind and bolted through the covering.
At any costs, no matter what it was like outside, I wasn't going to be in that church or building. I ran towards anywhere I could and I turned after about twenty yards to look back. What I saw was a flimsy, dark tent, ready to be blown away with the next strong wind. The tent itself was faint, weather-worn, and it seemed totally abandoned. I looked and thought to myself; I hate that tent! It's just a tent but it was much different on the inside. How could it be?
The tent was being held up by hollow aluminum poles that were bending and coming loose from their stakes in the ground. The flaps were beating up against the tent. From all the wind the poles were buckling under the pressure and the church, the people inside, their song, was about to be blown away into oblivion.
The entire outdoor area was brown and grey with a storm brewing and very ominous. Very Armageddon. The whole area was abandoned. "This sucks." I said calmly. After all, I had believed I was going to see a movie. I wasn't going to hang around to find out what the words they chanted meant. And I didn't have the words in my mouth so I could never recall what they were.
If the wind were an omen rushing swiftly as part of the unfolding scenes, this was a sustained warning and not an all-out alarming scream of danger. The scream was hidden in their words. The danger was inside. The elements were now free and outside. Then I saw a land ahead, depressing, discouraging, and despairing. These lands I know, I thought. No illusions here.
A row of old 12th century churches rose up on the horizon and crumbled before my eyes. Like sandcastles being washed away with the tide. The crumbling caused massive dust clouds that were guided by the storm to pelt the tent church. There was wrath being drawn upon it. Then the dust settled on the tent church moments away from being swept up by a foul event. I stood afar and waited.
I stood in what seemed like the concession stand at a movie theater. I went through the doors, and it was dark with very little light, with the usual row of chairs and draped walls that a theater would have. In front of all the seats, there was a stage, not a screen. I thought I was alone. I turned around to look at the place, but I wasn't alone and there were people all about the place. Half the seats were empty, while the other half, scattered here and there, people sat as if awaiting a movie to start. On the stage were long, silken drapes of gold, yellow, and white. There was a choir on stage and they were humming while someone was talking to the people in the audience. The talker seemed to be sly, covert, and full of cunning. All the walls changed and were decorated with bright, glaring images of crosses. Of people from a long time ago and statues of angels with trumpets and harps. The choir was singing now. I had taken notice, and they were singing apparently like they were before I had come in, and I stopped at a chair and looked on.
I was trying to be unnoticed. As I watched them singing, it seemed they weren't singing any 'words' and they were, I could almost swear, 'chanting' and their faces and chants were empty. There was nothing there. Their smiles were like grins of menace. I slinked down the aisle towards the exit sign. Like all movie theaters, this church had an exit door that was located somewhere near the side of the stage. A door that one had to make their way past all the seats to get to. I walked purposefully in a 'I'm supposed to be going this way, don't pay any attention to me' attitude. I reached the exit doors.
As I tried to open them they seemed to be locked, but then the knob budged a little and I knew it wasn't bolted. I sensed that a strong wind outside was blowing up against the sides of the building. That was what must have been making the door resist. The situation was now that it was a simple storm that gave me the impression that I may have been locked inside. I pushed the door very hard and found myself in a small little foyer that had a flapping canvas covering the passage to the outside. I felt a tremendous gust of wind and bolted through the covering.
At any costs, no matter what it was like outside, I wasn't going to be in that church or building. I ran towards anywhere I could and I turned after about twenty yards to look back. What I saw was a flimsy, dark tent, ready to be blown away with the next strong wind. The tent itself was faint, weather-worn, and it seemed totally abandoned. I looked and thought to myself; I hate that tent! It's just a tent but it was much different on the inside. How could it be?
The tent was being held up by hollow aluminum poles that were bending and coming loose from their stakes in the ground. The flaps were beating up against the tent. From all the wind the poles were buckling under the pressure and the church, the people inside, their song, was about to be blown away into oblivion.
The entire outdoor area was brown and grey with a storm brewing and very ominous. Very Armageddon. The whole area was abandoned. "This sucks." I said calmly. After all, I had believed I was going to see a movie. I wasn't going to hang around to find out what the words they chanted meant. And I didn't have the words in my mouth so I could never recall what they were.
If the wind were an omen rushing swiftly as part of the unfolding scenes, this was a sustained warning and not an all-out alarming scream of danger. The scream was hidden in their words. The danger was inside. The elements were now free and outside. Then I saw a land ahead, depressing, discouraging, and despairing. These lands I know, I thought. No illusions here.
A row of old 12th century churches rose up on the horizon and crumbled before my eyes. Like sandcastles being washed away with the tide. The crumbling caused massive dust clouds that were guided by the storm to pelt the tent church. There was wrath being drawn upon it. Then the dust settled on the tent church moments away from being swept up by a foul event. I stood afar and waited.
Tuesday, July 7, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 13
Violence Of Demons
There came a day when it was possible to drive less than 200 miles to visit anyone I knew. The distances had been so overwhelming at times. Long spans of time had passed. We were there at a kind of intermission. No more running from phone to phone and talking haltingly, lest someone walk by and listen. I had seen places like hell encircle them and infest everything and everywhere. The sleep of they who walked were as moving pawns like poisoned servants. Strangers would stand in the middle of such dark scenes and amid such ghastly walls of darkness and dull recreations of some evil ancient time, and would never notice any of it. Like sleepwalkers or puppets with no acknowledgement whatsoever.
Dark blue waters poured upon the earth, and in a clear sky whirlwinds slashed through buildings, radio stations and houses. Two demons stood, appearing large at first and then seeming the size of ordinary men. One of the demons looked at me and accused me. It pointed a clawed finger at me and seemed mute, but then it was heard. Saying that I traveled in their domains uninvited. The demonic figures on the open of a field stood high upon another field that layered over the first somehow. The demon that had been pointing at me kept on cursing me and threatened horrible pain upon me.
Then the other demon struck the first with a blunt object. It wasn't in my defense, but for the competition or the pleasure to be the giver of pain and suffering. I could not see the other demon so well as it was far more elusive and disappeared from sight. I looked all around me. I was afraid. Then in a sudden burst of resolve, I struggled with a fear and overcame it. I knocked the demon that I could see over the side of an earthen mound of soil with a torch-lit staff from a Methuselah tree. As the demon fell a loud shriek went out and it pierced the air and almost shattered my ears.
I stood there stunned. The demonic figure had cracked his head upon a dark blue pipeline. I could see the blood flow down the sides of the protruding apparatus. I had wondered if the demons were once men. There was no sign of the other demon, and the sky darkened. It was still somewhere. I was waiting for it.
There came a day when it was possible to drive less than 200 miles to visit anyone I knew. The distances had been so overwhelming at times. Long spans of time had passed. We were there at a kind of intermission. No more running from phone to phone and talking haltingly, lest someone walk by and listen. I had seen places like hell encircle them and infest everything and everywhere. The sleep of they who walked were as moving pawns like poisoned servants. Strangers would stand in the middle of such dark scenes and amid such ghastly walls of darkness and dull recreations of some evil ancient time, and would never notice any of it. Like sleepwalkers or puppets with no acknowledgement whatsoever.
Dark blue waters poured upon the earth, and in a clear sky whirlwinds slashed through buildings, radio stations and houses. Two demons stood, appearing large at first and then seeming the size of ordinary men. One of the demons looked at me and accused me. It pointed a clawed finger at me and seemed mute, but then it was heard. Saying that I traveled in their domains uninvited. The demonic figures on the open of a field stood high upon another field that layered over the first somehow. The demon that had been pointing at me kept on cursing me and threatened horrible pain upon me.
Then the other demon struck the first with a blunt object. It wasn't in my defense, but for the competition or the pleasure to be the giver of pain and suffering. I could not see the other demon so well as it was far more elusive and disappeared from sight. I looked all around me. I was afraid. Then in a sudden burst of resolve, I struggled with a fear and overcame it. I knocked the demon that I could see over the side of an earthen mound of soil with a torch-lit staff from a Methuselah tree. As the demon fell a loud shriek went out and it pierced the air and almost shattered my ears.
I stood there stunned. The demonic figure had cracked his head upon a dark blue pipeline. I could see the blood flow down the sides of the protruding apparatus. I had wondered if the demons were once men. There was no sign of the other demon, and the sky darkened. It was still somewhere. I was waiting for it.
Monday, July 6, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 14
Onslaught Of Nightmares
The house stood lonely and dark on a rarely traveled road. Gloomy, a mood of evil hung about it. I was grievously ill and for the first few weeks I had nothing but nightmares after a horrible series of events. The bloodshed and the wars going on in various places rang out like gunfire in the world, and even the semi-automatic weapons were vivid enough to cause very realistic dreams. But waking from them was another story. Too weak. Given up on all chances of survival.
Those tunnels lead to enclosed brick chambers, where it'd be possible for hiding long amounts of time but so dim and covered with years of decay and pollution that one would have to be desperate to live in the first place. Only a soldier could endure.
I saw some unknown people hiding there. I could stand right in front of them, and they'd never see me. Then a soldier appeared and walked past a fire within the chamber. Appearing to be some forgotten relic from the Vietnam era and although he looked as any other living soldier from that time, like some animated playback, it was as if he were a shell and that I was seeing just the memory of his image. There was an emptiness and somewhere in that there was something else. Another layer that slowly unfolded. The soldier spoke.
"You ever stand on the Platform of Challenge?"
"Maybe. The dead air in some places is more unnerving, though. That was one just point of origin."
"It's dark. Save for the candles." The soldier said.
"Why are there massive hotels, homes and schools and those immense buildings that within is nobody? No footsteps fall or tread the floors but there's always something stirring in them." I reflected.
"What are you even going in those places for?"
"I thought I saw something. Besides it was cold outside. I sought shelter." I said trying to think of why.
In a way, those places are worse than the tunnels and the dim, distorted chambers, they're reflections of all that is despairing, the greed of the world, murder and death. How full they all are and yet there is infinite emptiness. My thoughts wandered off and I felt beyond weary. The soldier now sat and stared out into space. I was reading his thoughts as they echoed in my ears.
"I see it all, you know?" I said. "I see these things in everything, everywhere, and everyone. They sleep all the time, carrying on in celebration. I don't know what the occasion is, I always come in on another hour."
"Ah, the sleepwalkers. The sleep of they who walk. Then fall down and break all their bones on the deceptions they were shown." The soldier spoke in almost a defeated tone of voice.
"What is their problem? They're there among such chilling scenes of utter evil and don't even notice any of it!" I said. It bewildered me to recall what I had seen, and remembered that any escape would lead to stranger lands. Stress, anxiety and worry were the least of concerns to be addressed here. This is a dark world. With nightmarish experiences. One barely sleeps in solid places but it would all reawaken more vividly in dreams.
It was the second night and the dark creature leapt out from nowhere again. A long series of past days I would witness in the form of years before I even arrived, would begin. With everything the way it was, the soldier would only walk along. I noticed the slight darkness in the air as the end of a century came to a close. Clear and sharp it was. More of a sense of awareness than a sense of abandon. There was a dead, silent air that proceeded the onslaught.
The soldier was gone momentarily but a second soldier came into full view. "You're afraid, aren't you?" The voice seemed to come out of nowhere.
"You are not the keeper of the realm." I told him. He sat near a ruin of stone and bamboo.
"Is there any comfort in the final hours? The torment of an ongoing death? That pain?" By now I felt frozen tears fall and my heart broke into a thousand pieces. It was still cold outside. Then I felt that I was on fire and I stood motionless.
"You could end the suffering and join in on the sleep. Take comfort and be away from all this." The voice now seemed disguised but was so doleful and out-of-touch with time and place. It was both comforting and yet even dreadful.
"Well, I'm not afraid like that. On that count, you're wrong. I've dared many a demon and battled them." I said finally. "But what shall stop death? You can't. Those walls can't shut it out."
"Your father has and will." At that my hands froze against my heart, and I was struck by the beauty of those words. I was listening and there was silence.
As usual, this was some distant drumbeat that never shakes the ground. A justice that never proceeds, it only winks from behind somewhere that can never be reached. The gavel was already shattered. That was what I heard a lot louder than the drumbeats. But I could hear something behind the dead air. Although it was stagnant. I heard the dull winds pick up. I clutched my hands again, still cold but not as frigid.
There was an onslaught of the most evil things that accumulated as I watched helplessly. I could not see everything but felt it all the same. There were a multitude of years of dark deeds that rushed past me like a tidal wave.
"Leave the Platform of Challenge behind you!" The voice seemed to boom behind a wall of haze.
"What about this place?" I felt that I sobbed for hours because everyone was dead but those words were spoken almost as if an afterthought.
"What do you mean?" The voice asked in a softer tone.
"A green place of serene beauty, cleared walkways winding through palms and carpets of grass with the sun shining in a day that never stung and lasted long, has turned into a dank, deep and sunken jungle, twisted with black wood and endless vine."
I recalled what it all seemed to me. Then I spoke again with more resolve. "Once I go over into the other side, I will seek after the enemy there. A bounty I will imagine, a bounty I will remember! I will bring something for the price of pain that I paid." I stood upright and my eyes flashed and pierced all corners of darkness and I was burning with an intense fire.
I continued. "I will be a terror in the blackest hearts and they will loathe my vision for I will see everything and somewhere in their sleep, they'll know I saw them. A fury they will harbor and unleash all battles inside that realm, and there is where I'll bring them to their bones. I was a spirit and they were flesh. I am the counter-balance of nightmares. I dream in awareness."
Then there was a complete silence, the mock voice of reasoning had somehow abandoned the area. Death overcome, weapon given and I walked off the platform of challenge and the soldier was resting. All those structures stood without harboring ill will and they waited for the soldiers who passed, where there was finally a waiting host.
The house stood lonely and dark on a rarely traveled road. Gloomy, a mood of evil hung about it. I was grievously ill and for the first few weeks I had nothing but nightmares after a horrible series of events. The bloodshed and the wars going on in various places rang out like gunfire in the world, and even the semi-automatic weapons were vivid enough to cause very realistic dreams. But waking from them was another story. Too weak. Given up on all chances of survival.
Those tunnels lead to enclosed brick chambers, where it'd be possible for hiding long amounts of time but so dim and covered with years of decay and pollution that one would have to be desperate to live in the first place. Only a soldier could endure.
I saw some unknown people hiding there. I could stand right in front of them, and they'd never see me. Then a soldier appeared and walked past a fire within the chamber. Appearing to be some forgotten relic from the Vietnam era and although he looked as any other living soldier from that time, like some animated playback, it was as if he were a shell and that I was seeing just the memory of his image. There was an emptiness and somewhere in that there was something else. Another layer that slowly unfolded. The soldier spoke.
"You ever stand on the Platform of Challenge?"
"Maybe. The dead air in some places is more unnerving, though. That was one just point of origin."
"It's dark. Save for the candles." The soldier said.
"Why are there massive hotels, homes and schools and those immense buildings that within is nobody? No footsteps fall or tread the floors but there's always something stirring in them." I reflected.
"What are you even going in those places for?"
"I thought I saw something. Besides it was cold outside. I sought shelter." I said trying to think of why.
In a way, those places are worse than the tunnels and the dim, distorted chambers, they're reflections of all that is despairing, the greed of the world, murder and death. How full they all are and yet there is infinite emptiness. My thoughts wandered off and I felt beyond weary. The soldier now sat and stared out into space. I was reading his thoughts as they echoed in my ears.
"I see it all, you know?" I said. "I see these things in everything, everywhere, and everyone. They sleep all the time, carrying on in celebration. I don't know what the occasion is, I always come in on another hour."
"Ah, the sleepwalkers. The sleep of they who walk. Then fall down and break all their bones on the deceptions they were shown." The soldier spoke in almost a defeated tone of voice.
"What is their problem? They're there among such chilling scenes of utter evil and don't even notice any of it!" I said. It bewildered me to recall what I had seen, and remembered that any escape would lead to stranger lands. Stress, anxiety and worry were the least of concerns to be addressed here. This is a dark world. With nightmarish experiences. One barely sleeps in solid places but it would all reawaken more vividly in dreams.
It was the second night and the dark creature leapt out from nowhere again. A long series of past days I would witness in the form of years before I even arrived, would begin. With everything the way it was, the soldier would only walk along. I noticed the slight darkness in the air as the end of a century came to a close. Clear and sharp it was. More of a sense of awareness than a sense of abandon. There was a dead, silent air that proceeded the onslaught.
The soldier was gone momentarily but a second soldier came into full view. "You're afraid, aren't you?" The voice seemed to come out of nowhere.
"You are not the keeper of the realm." I told him. He sat near a ruin of stone and bamboo.
"Is there any comfort in the final hours? The torment of an ongoing death? That pain?" By now I felt frozen tears fall and my heart broke into a thousand pieces. It was still cold outside. Then I felt that I was on fire and I stood motionless.
"You could end the suffering and join in on the sleep. Take comfort and be away from all this." The voice now seemed disguised but was so doleful and out-of-touch with time and place. It was both comforting and yet even dreadful.
"Well, I'm not afraid like that. On that count, you're wrong. I've dared many a demon and battled them." I said finally. "But what shall stop death? You can't. Those walls can't shut it out."
"Your father has and will." At that my hands froze against my heart, and I was struck by the beauty of those words. I was listening and there was silence.
As usual, this was some distant drumbeat that never shakes the ground. A justice that never proceeds, it only winks from behind somewhere that can never be reached. The gavel was already shattered. That was what I heard a lot louder than the drumbeats. But I could hear something behind the dead air. Although it was stagnant. I heard the dull winds pick up. I clutched my hands again, still cold but not as frigid.
There was an onslaught of the most evil things that accumulated as I watched helplessly. I could not see everything but felt it all the same. There were a multitude of years of dark deeds that rushed past me like a tidal wave.
"Leave the Platform of Challenge behind you!" The voice seemed to boom behind a wall of haze.
"What about this place?" I felt that I sobbed for hours because everyone was dead but those words were spoken almost as if an afterthought.
"What do you mean?" The voice asked in a softer tone.
"A green place of serene beauty, cleared walkways winding through palms and carpets of grass with the sun shining in a day that never stung and lasted long, has turned into a dank, deep and sunken jungle, twisted with black wood and endless vine."
I recalled what it all seemed to me. Then I spoke again with more resolve. "Once I go over into the other side, I will seek after the enemy there. A bounty I will imagine, a bounty I will remember! I will bring something for the price of pain that I paid." I stood upright and my eyes flashed and pierced all corners of darkness and I was burning with an intense fire.
I continued. "I will be a terror in the blackest hearts and they will loathe my vision for I will see everything and somewhere in their sleep, they'll know I saw them. A fury they will harbor and unleash all battles inside that realm, and there is where I'll bring them to their bones. I was a spirit and they were flesh. I am the counter-balance of nightmares. I dream in awareness."
Then there was a complete silence, the mock voice of reasoning had somehow abandoned the area. Death overcome, weapon given and I walked off the platform of challenge and the soldier was resting. All those structures stood without harboring ill will and they waited for the soldiers who passed, where there was finally a waiting host.
Sunday, July 5, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 15
Gray Creature Boy Falls
Where suddenly the ground opened up in front of me, I realized that it was the edge of a cliff. The drop seemed a two thousand foot distance from the top to the bottom. Everywhere was gray and some kind of storm was brewing. I was standing close to the edge and I shifted through the air and floated close to the cliff wall as I looked upon it, up and down.
A grayish layer of mist shrouded the ground like a haunting impedance. There was something already present but it could not be seen. As I dangled there, surveying the surface, I couldn't make out anything because I was still too far up to distinguish any movement on the ground. All I could see was a thick fog and some kind of rock protruding from the ground that ran a fourth of the way beside the cliff wall. It splintered out from the cliff wall and rose out separately, leaving a gap between it and the side of the massive cliff.
I returned my gaze to the top of the cliff where I stood close to the edge. I saw something or someone. I couldn't tell what I was seeing because it was a blur. I walked towards the figure, my hand extended because the figure stood dangerously close and I knew, whatever it was, didn't belong there and could fall unless it was as I was. An observer. As I neared I could see it was like a person, but not human. With almost the body of a twelve year old boy, the figure had a gray transparent skin tone and very dark hair. The eyes were abnormally big and round. It seemed to have a creature-like stature, for its unusual, uncanny way to blend in with the landscape I was seeing below. I paused and shook off a chill so icy that I sensed that I froze solid. Suddenly the strange being turned and plunged down the cliff. I could not tell if it was a move of self-destruction or if the sudden awareness of my presence made the creature boy do this. I ran over to the place he had stood and looked down.
The fall, it seemed, took much less time than normal for the fact that the cliff was very high up and where the creature boy had struck was over a thousand feet below. Everything being so gray and very little light for the immense cloud cover, I could still see the red streams of blood almost sparkle against the protruding rock that he had landed on. Having landed on his back, and because the rock surface on which was struck was smooth and just barely the width and length of the creature boy himself, I could see that from the force of the fall, the spidery arms were completely thrown out from their sockets. Red streams trickled down from each side to the ground. I choked back tears in horror, and wondered why this would be.
On the ground, on either side of the rock formation, lay each arm. I was mortified and I cried out. I felt I was in a state of shock because for a moment it came to me that he fell to let blood flow to the ground because something was just waiting for the scent. The gray creature boy fell as an offering of death it seemed. I looked upon the face and knew it was too late to save him.
He seemed so fragile and near death when he stood atop the cliff but I could not understand why he was so startled as to choose to fly over the edge so quickly. I saw that his eyes were still open, almost completely black except for a small lining of white around the iris. It looked demonic but not in a scary, twisted sense. In a way that appeared to be the work of demons, but not a demon within or of itself. As I looked upon the tragic face it almost seemed that it was still alive. I cringed and thought if it is still alive it must be suffering beyond comprehension. The face so cold and lifeless, so void of any breath of light, like a mirrored reflection of the mist that surrounded the foot of the cliff. Coldly there came a sinking sense of pain and despair from below the cliff. I went over the side, hoping that by some unseen miracle that there was something I could do.
I floated there above the figure and peered deep into the face and saw a slight movement. To my horror it did seem that it was still alive but barely hanging on to its last breath for whatever reason that I could not fathom. I spoke to this boy creature and told him that I would save him and make him whole again. I couldn't take it anymore and I drifted down towards the bottom of the cliff to find some way out of the place, this area of doom.
Now closer to the ground, in the thick of the mist, I could see the ground for the first time. The soil layer was more like clay, of gray and dull brown colors with so much moisture that it almost had a muddy texture. Dead, twisted trees scattered the landscape. Small hills and clay-like piles were here and there. I froze and knew the small grayish piles were hiding something grim beneath. Through the mist I saw a little pathway, like a road paved by dry dirt and rocks.
Almost immediately rescue vehicles came speeding through the dense fog. There were ambulances, fire trucks and even a few army jeeps, coming to rescue the gray creature boy. I watched from beneath the trees and stayed about two or three feet off the ground. Suddenly out of underground spores, holes and cracks in the ground where the grayish piles had begun to open, there came an army of scorpions. Huge, black menacing scorpions. I looked toward a fire truck that was ready to stop. I knew that if the scorpions didn't puncture the tires that they would wait until someone got out of one of their vehicles to strike and devour them. The blood from the creature boy was well absorbed into the ground at this point and the scorpions were hunting for more blood. I hovered above the floor of the great cliff but had somehow moved further away from it and found I was almost a half mile from it now. I felt the uttermost urge to flee. I looked as more scorpions rushed out from the ground.
They were fiercely hungry.
I awoke.
Circa 1997
Where suddenly the ground opened up in front of me, I realized that it was the edge of a cliff. The drop seemed a two thousand foot distance from the top to the bottom. Everywhere was gray and some kind of storm was brewing. I was standing close to the edge and I shifted through the air and floated close to the cliff wall as I looked upon it, up and down.
A grayish layer of mist shrouded the ground like a haunting impedance. There was something already present but it could not be seen. As I dangled there, surveying the surface, I couldn't make out anything because I was still too far up to distinguish any movement on the ground. All I could see was a thick fog and some kind of rock protruding from the ground that ran a fourth of the way beside the cliff wall. It splintered out from the cliff wall and rose out separately, leaving a gap between it and the side of the massive cliff.
I returned my gaze to the top of the cliff where I stood close to the edge. I saw something or someone. I couldn't tell what I was seeing because it was a blur. I walked towards the figure, my hand extended because the figure stood dangerously close and I knew, whatever it was, didn't belong there and could fall unless it was as I was. An observer. As I neared I could see it was like a person, but not human. With almost the body of a twelve year old boy, the figure had a gray transparent skin tone and very dark hair. The eyes were abnormally big and round. It seemed to have a creature-like stature, for its unusual, uncanny way to blend in with the landscape I was seeing below. I paused and shook off a chill so icy that I sensed that I froze solid. Suddenly the strange being turned and plunged down the cliff. I could not tell if it was a move of self-destruction or if the sudden awareness of my presence made the creature boy do this. I ran over to the place he had stood and looked down.
The fall, it seemed, took much less time than normal for the fact that the cliff was very high up and where the creature boy had struck was over a thousand feet below. Everything being so gray and very little light for the immense cloud cover, I could still see the red streams of blood almost sparkle against the protruding rock that he had landed on. Having landed on his back, and because the rock surface on which was struck was smooth and just barely the width and length of the creature boy himself, I could see that from the force of the fall, the spidery arms were completely thrown out from their sockets. Red streams trickled down from each side to the ground. I choked back tears in horror, and wondered why this would be.
On the ground, on either side of the rock formation, lay each arm. I was mortified and I cried out. I felt I was in a state of shock because for a moment it came to me that he fell to let blood flow to the ground because something was just waiting for the scent. The gray creature boy fell as an offering of death it seemed. I looked upon the face and knew it was too late to save him.
He seemed so fragile and near death when he stood atop the cliff but I could not understand why he was so startled as to choose to fly over the edge so quickly. I saw that his eyes were still open, almost completely black except for a small lining of white around the iris. It looked demonic but not in a scary, twisted sense. In a way that appeared to be the work of demons, but not a demon within or of itself. As I looked upon the tragic face it almost seemed that it was still alive. I cringed and thought if it is still alive it must be suffering beyond comprehension. The face so cold and lifeless, so void of any breath of light, like a mirrored reflection of the mist that surrounded the foot of the cliff. Coldly there came a sinking sense of pain and despair from below the cliff. I went over the side, hoping that by some unseen miracle that there was something I could do.
I floated there above the figure and peered deep into the face and saw a slight movement. To my horror it did seem that it was still alive but barely hanging on to its last breath for whatever reason that I could not fathom. I spoke to this boy creature and told him that I would save him and make him whole again. I couldn't take it anymore and I drifted down towards the bottom of the cliff to find some way out of the place, this area of doom.
Now closer to the ground, in the thick of the mist, I could see the ground for the first time. The soil layer was more like clay, of gray and dull brown colors with so much moisture that it almost had a muddy texture. Dead, twisted trees scattered the landscape. Small hills and clay-like piles were here and there. I froze and knew the small grayish piles were hiding something grim beneath. Through the mist I saw a little pathway, like a road paved by dry dirt and rocks.
Almost immediately rescue vehicles came speeding through the dense fog. There were ambulances, fire trucks and even a few army jeeps, coming to rescue the gray creature boy. I watched from beneath the trees and stayed about two or three feet off the ground. Suddenly out of underground spores, holes and cracks in the ground where the grayish piles had begun to open, there came an army of scorpions. Huge, black menacing scorpions. I looked toward a fire truck that was ready to stop. I knew that if the scorpions didn't puncture the tires that they would wait until someone got out of one of their vehicles to strike and devour them. The blood from the creature boy was well absorbed into the ground at this point and the scorpions were hunting for more blood. I hovered above the floor of the great cliff but had somehow moved further away from it and found I was almost a half mile from it now. I felt the uttermost urge to flee. I looked as more scorpions rushed out from the ground.
They were fiercely hungry.
I awoke.
Circa 1997
Saturday, July 4, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 16
Other Distorted Chambers & Night Images On The Hour
I slept for many hours before going back in. It's now winter. This darkly prelude was affected by the late season. Time here still seemed to slow to a drag.
I observed gigantic power structures of lights and electricity and a station where power surplus was abundant. I saw a very rich man with his son playing around with all the switches and machinery of the power plant. I flew outside the window. It was night time. There was ice and snow in a frozen-down world. It seemed I looked upon the utmost Northern territories, a midnight blue sky, striped to a bare thin atmosphere.
On the lands I saw a great city for which the power station was providing its lights. It was so immense and stretched out beyond what the eye could see, section after section, streets after streets. It made New York City look like Boonville. Lights began to flicker off and on, some sections lost power completely. I glided down towards the center of this mass population, there was some kind of celebration and I noticed carnival rides and such. It seemed there were long, tall poles reaching up to the dark sky and the sky was already brewing with a massive storm. Everyone was screaming and laughing and carrying on in their festivities. I drifted down towards the people that seemed to gather. I noticed they saw me. No one's ever seen me before in this way. Stranger still because I knew I was not in the flesh as I was clearly flying around.
The tones of bewilderment hung for long unspoken moments because I did not know why I was there and was allowed to be seen by the sleepwalkers. I was draped in a long white cloak of some kind, and winter clothing in long layers beneath the cloak. I figured for a moment that was how I was being detected, instead of the stealth cover of angles of light and shadow, I was a bright object against the dark background of a winter night. I used my hands to guide my movement as if I were in a ship and I was the pilot. Except that the ship was itself invisible. This was what I knew to be a disjointed chamber of an outside area somewhere in the northern half of the world.
Really I thought this was just weird. I spoke to the masses but not something I had planned to say. In fact I wished to not say a word and drift back into the safe cover of the sky I now navigated. "Gather yourselves!" I said. "The day of judgement comes upon you!" as if another voice spoke through me but it was still my voice, only enhanced. No sign of chill or fear. Even the tone and long-ranging audible power in which I delivered it didn't seem at all like me. I was apathetic to it all nonetheless.
I felt a good presence near and I felt that I would soon be meeting up with that, I didn't even care what was happening. At this point I was just ready to leave this dark wintry, uncertain realm of flickering lights once and for all. I thought that a ship was waiting for me and all I'd have to do now is go to it. I thought to myself; After we're all through here, I'll get on board, maybe a snack, and then some much needed sleep and genuine rest.
December 1997
I slept for many hours before going back in. It's now winter. This darkly prelude was affected by the late season. Time here still seemed to slow to a drag.
I observed gigantic power structures of lights and electricity and a station where power surplus was abundant. I saw a very rich man with his son playing around with all the switches and machinery of the power plant. I flew outside the window. It was night time. There was ice and snow in a frozen-down world. It seemed I looked upon the utmost Northern territories, a midnight blue sky, striped to a bare thin atmosphere.
On the lands I saw a great city for which the power station was providing its lights. It was so immense and stretched out beyond what the eye could see, section after section, streets after streets. It made New York City look like Boonville. Lights began to flicker off and on, some sections lost power completely. I glided down towards the center of this mass population, there was some kind of celebration and I noticed carnival rides and such. It seemed there were long, tall poles reaching up to the dark sky and the sky was already brewing with a massive storm. Everyone was screaming and laughing and carrying on in their festivities. I drifted down towards the people that seemed to gather. I noticed they saw me. No one's ever seen me before in this way. Stranger still because I knew I was not in the flesh as I was clearly flying around.
The tones of bewilderment hung for long unspoken moments because I did not know why I was there and was allowed to be seen by the sleepwalkers. I was draped in a long white cloak of some kind, and winter clothing in long layers beneath the cloak. I figured for a moment that was how I was being detected, instead of the stealth cover of angles of light and shadow, I was a bright object against the dark background of a winter night. I used my hands to guide my movement as if I were in a ship and I was the pilot. Except that the ship was itself invisible. This was what I knew to be a disjointed chamber of an outside area somewhere in the northern half of the world.
Really I thought this was just weird. I spoke to the masses but not something I had planned to say. In fact I wished to not say a word and drift back into the safe cover of the sky I now navigated. "Gather yourselves!" I said. "The day of judgement comes upon you!" as if another voice spoke through me but it was still my voice, only enhanced. No sign of chill or fear. Even the tone and long-ranging audible power in which I delivered it didn't seem at all like me. I was apathetic to it all nonetheless.
I felt a good presence near and I felt that I would soon be meeting up with that, I didn't even care what was happening. At this point I was just ready to leave this dark wintry, uncertain realm of flickering lights once and for all. I thought that a ship was waiting for me and all I'd have to do now is go to it. I thought to myself; After we're all through here, I'll get on board, maybe a snack, and then some much needed sleep and genuine rest.
December 1997
Friday, July 3, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 17
Mammoth Waterfall
Rachel and I were walking out of a building and towards a parking lot. For some reason we stopped to see if anyone was following us. We had a sense that danger was behind but it dissolved as we continued. Black iron chairs, with slated grating aligned a small walkway that led to some bridge. We had just crossed the treacherous looking structure when we looked out over the skyline. It was as if we had looked out of an airplane window as we were looking out over the tops of the clouds, or what would have seemed like clouds. We saw a waterfall that was very wide and fell down for miles.
The sound of the water crashing to the bottom could not be heard, only the flow of it and it was like wind. It made small sparkling noises as small droplets would collide with the main body of the water.
It sounded like music only very distant and quiet under the sound of the flow which was ominously terrifying and wondrously peaceful at the same time. We climbed down more stairs and looked back up at the waterfall from the opposite side we had come from. It seemed to me that the black iron-like bridge and descending stairs upon either side were very thin and not sturdy enough. The waterfall plunged down so far that the ground could not be seen. A vast yet soft mist of white encompassed the fall and drifted thinly upward where the massive water ran over the edge, cascading down from some unseen river in the planes of the sky. Blinding daylight sparkled against everything. Wherever we were, we were well within the atmosphere and therefore felt more at ease.
Quickly I retraced some steps to other distant realms. I remembered the woods of another path long ago, where a path wound around the trees that it seemed a maze of natural surroundings, but it had no end or border, no middle point, no answer. And a cliff side hidden by obscurity, winding through a bleak canyon of white sand and red clay dust. And the small cave-like dwelling near the top in a remote corner carved into the stone. A road was there once, a paved highway and was still just as distant. An Arabic symbol and design along the tops of the stones. It appeared to be a half moon with a single prong from a crown or a fork, resembling a weapon worn as an ornament, next to it.
And a dwelling had been dug into the side of a massive sand dune that had since began to turn solid. An echo seemed to emit from the cliffs. Human voices.
I stood and gazed at the waterfall and wondered if there was some kind of cave behind it. A cliff-side that used to be dry and in a wasteland area of the world. This mammoth waterfall was either an entrance to these other realms, or it was an escape from them. But the bottom of the fall could only be reached from the rickety iron spiraling stairs.
Rachel and I were walking out of a building and towards a parking lot. For some reason we stopped to see if anyone was following us. We had a sense that danger was behind but it dissolved as we continued. Black iron chairs, with slated grating aligned a small walkway that led to some bridge. We had just crossed the treacherous looking structure when we looked out over the skyline. It was as if we had looked out of an airplane window as we were looking out over the tops of the clouds, or what would have seemed like clouds. We saw a waterfall that was very wide and fell down for miles.
The sound of the water crashing to the bottom could not be heard, only the flow of it and it was like wind. It made small sparkling noises as small droplets would collide with the main body of the water.
It sounded like music only very distant and quiet under the sound of the flow which was ominously terrifying and wondrously peaceful at the same time. We climbed down more stairs and looked back up at the waterfall from the opposite side we had come from. It seemed to me that the black iron-like bridge and descending stairs upon either side were very thin and not sturdy enough. The waterfall plunged down so far that the ground could not be seen. A vast yet soft mist of white encompassed the fall and drifted thinly upward where the massive water ran over the edge, cascading down from some unseen river in the planes of the sky. Blinding daylight sparkled against everything. Wherever we were, we were well within the atmosphere and therefore felt more at ease.
Quickly I retraced some steps to other distant realms. I remembered the woods of another path long ago, where a path wound around the trees that it seemed a maze of natural surroundings, but it had no end or border, no middle point, no answer. And a cliff side hidden by obscurity, winding through a bleak canyon of white sand and red clay dust. And the small cave-like dwelling near the top in a remote corner carved into the stone. A road was there once, a paved highway and was still just as distant. An Arabic symbol and design along the tops of the stones. It appeared to be a half moon with a single prong from a crown or a fork, resembling a weapon worn as an ornament, next to it.
And a dwelling had been dug into the side of a massive sand dune that had since began to turn solid. An echo seemed to emit from the cliffs. Human voices.
I stood and gazed at the waterfall and wondered if there was some kind of cave behind it. A cliff-side that used to be dry and in a wasteland area of the world. This mammoth waterfall was either an entrance to these other realms, or it was an escape from them. But the bottom of the fall could only be reached from the rickety iron spiraling stairs.
Thursday, July 2, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 18
Colliding Spheres
I was traveling when the car I was riding in stopped. I continued on foot. I can't remember exactly where I was going but I seemed to be heading to a house of someone I knew.
While I was walking I passed this strange person who appeared to be two extremely different people but was just one person. It unnerved me. I found myself at this Shell station, one that had a Taco Bell inside it. There were some people inside doing some work but so absently as if they weren't even there. I could see them out of the corner of my eye and I could hear them but when I looked straight at them, they were gone. I had the strangest impression that the place was merely echoing some memory of their presence.
Outside the windows I could see the distant comet light in the sky. I wondered what I was doing in that place and if it was closed, but everything seemed to be open and operating. I left. Further on I was standing by some gasoline pumps and this place seemed to be a Texaco. There was a man working inside. He looked very friendly. He was smiling and seemed very kind. As I looked back at the gas pumps I saw all the numbers go crazy and they were turning so fast that all I could see was a blur of red flashing digits. I walked towards the door and noticed a lady inside talking with the man inside. The man was suddenly quiet. The lady was asking for directions when he grabbed her and told me to get out of there or I'd be killed. He grabbed a gun and was locking himself and the lady inside the station with him. No one else was around so no one but me saw this happen. I left.
I knew there was nothing I could do because everything outside was abandoned. It wasn't of fear of the man who threatened me, it was that I wasn't really there to begin with. I couldn't change this outcome. The man was like the person I saw from before - he changed with the snap of a finger, he even seemed to be a little different in appearance and size.
I was now traveling down a strange, but all too familiar road. I had navigated this one before. All around there were green rolling hills, and set in shadow with the daylight hanging luminously above like a suspended state of sunset. The sun shown like a distant lamplight, as if being filtered through a blue reflection from a glassy sky. Dark blue and fading but never like dusk. Soft yellowish and warm light rested until within a short time night fell and there was no more light. Within seconds it was all gone. The reflection was still there. The road itself narrow and twisted along the bottom of one hill and then up and over the other hills. There was a kind of pattern about the road, zig-zagging in giant L shapes. Always headed either away from the sunset or towards it.
I continued to see what lay over the next hill, to unravel the mystery. The sunset that never sinks behind the hills except in the moment when one is no longer on that stretch of road. I saw a dead land all around me. Tumbleweed was strewn about although this was no desert. I looked up to the now heavy sky and saw globes of natural bright colors. The surfaces of them bulged here and there, heading in succession towards the earth. They were moving slowly and they appeared solid. Crashing into the ground as if they were filled with vapor. I could hear the thud of the crashes but when I looked, all that seemed to happen was that they kicked up a puff of smoke upon impact. These spheres were ominous yet they seemed merely to be dead weight.
Again the hour is late. I go fetch myself a hot drink. It's not like true rest and sleep sometimes. It's like going from one task to another.
I was traveling when the car I was riding in stopped. I continued on foot. I can't remember exactly where I was going but I seemed to be heading to a house of someone I knew.
While I was walking I passed this strange person who appeared to be two extremely different people but was just one person. It unnerved me. I found myself at this Shell station, one that had a Taco Bell inside it. There were some people inside doing some work but so absently as if they weren't even there. I could see them out of the corner of my eye and I could hear them but when I looked straight at them, they were gone. I had the strangest impression that the place was merely echoing some memory of their presence.
Outside the windows I could see the distant comet light in the sky. I wondered what I was doing in that place and if it was closed, but everything seemed to be open and operating. I left. Further on I was standing by some gasoline pumps and this place seemed to be a Texaco. There was a man working inside. He looked very friendly. He was smiling and seemed very kind. As I looked back at the gas pumps I saw all the numbers go crazy and they were turning so fast that all I could see was a blur of red flashing digits. I walked towards the door and noticed a lady inside talking with the man inside. The man was suddenly quiet. The lady was asking for directions when he grabbed her and told me to get out of there or I'd be killed. He grabbed a gun and was locking himself and the lady inside the station with him. No one else was around so no one but me saw this happen. I left.
I knew there was nothing I could do because everything outside was abandoned. It wasn't of fear of the man who threatened me, it was that I wasn't really there to begin with. I couldn't change this outcome. The man was like the person I saw from before - he changed with the snap of a finger, he even seemed to be a little different in appearance and size.
I was now traveling down a strange, but all too familiar road. I had navigated this one before. All around there were green rolling hills, and set in shadow with the daylight hanging luminously above like a suspended state of sunset. The sun shown like a distant lamplight, as if being filtered through a blue reflection from a glassy sky. Dark blue and fading but never like dusk. Soft yellowish and warm light rested until within a short time night fell and there was no more light. Within seconds it was all gone. The reflection was still there. The road itself narrow and twisted along the bottom of one hill and then up and over the other hills. There was a kind of pattern about the road, zig-zagging in giant L shapes. Always headed either away from the sunset or towards it.
I continued to see what lay over the next hill, to unravel the mystery. The sunset that never sinks behind the hills except in the moment when one is no longer on that stretch of road. I saw a dead land all around me. Tumbleweed was strewn about although this was no desert. I looked up to the now heavy sky and saw globes of natural bright colors. The surfaces of them bulged here and there, heading in succession towards the earth. They were moving slowly and they appeared solid. Crashing into the ground as if they were filled with vapor. I could hear the thud of the crashes but when I looked, all that seemed to happen was that they kicked up a puff of smoke upon impact. These spheres were ominous yet they seemed merely to be dead weight.
Again the hour is late. I go fetch myself a hot drink. It's not like true rest and sleep sometimes. It's like going from one task to another.
Wednesday, July 1, 2015
Distorted Chambers In The Realm Of Dreams - Chapter 19
Driving Towards Desolate Land
Rachel and I were trying to get belongings packed up into the back of a mobile home or a van of some kind. Something had just happened, some poor soul was being thrown into a dark place and we were trying to save the belongings from being rummaged through by our enemies. Back inside, Rachel was crying and screaming in anger and disgust.
She was beyond upset, wrathful and defeated. I could have split the realm of Hell with the energy of my own wrath. But I had no clue what had happened. I just knew something happened. Suddenly in an unclear moment I thought she was angry with me because I was feeling defeated and at a breaking point though I could not remember what it was over. I was in a hurry to get things moved. Then I soon realized that she was addressing some demonic shadow in the corner to my left. The room where we stood was dark. It was a roundish living area that connected to a kitchen off to its side. I took note of the circular old house rug on the floor. I wasn't in the mood for throwing down demons. Mainly because I was still in shock over Rachel's apparent nervous breakdown.
I wanted to leave as soon as possible because the place was rather dismal enough by itself. A voice hung in the air. A dull, monotone voice. We couldn't really tell where it was coming from. I turned to Rachel and told her to block it out. She sat down and tightened her knuckles and began making fists, but still crying and yelling. I followed her lead and also commanded the demonic shadow's voice to shut up.
I looked back at Rachel and then looked in the mirror that hung on a nearby wall and Rachel came up and stood next to me. We noticed that both her and I had dark-brown circles under our eyes. We both looked beyond exhausted and so deprived of sleep that we appeared as mere shells of ourselves. Our faces were almost hollow from lack of sleep. We looked as if we had died.
"Rachel!" I pleaded, "We're not getting enough rest, this is an illusion because our flesh bodies are so tired that the shadow is using our weariness to deceive us! I'm here, there's nothing to fear!" Suddenly the demonic shadow appeared to have more shape and leapt from the corner and tore through the living room like a swirling wind inside the diameter of where we were standing. Things began being broken in the fury of the evil presence. Then it left shrieking out of the front door. After a few seconds the place was just a little bit lighter and we continued getting what we could salvage into boxes and loaded into the vehicle. There were broken pieces of mom's favorite tea pot, creamer and cups. I had to throw them away because they were too broken to mend.
Rachel had begun to look like herself again, but still tense. I went back in to get the last of the stuff. I was standing in an almost empty room and examined the wooden floor now with a crumpled gray-white rug sprawled out over it. I grabbed it and folded it. Suddenly little imitation pig-like figures came out of the corners from the walls, standing on their hind-legs. Instead of appearing scary, I thought they just looked stupid. I actually laughed. It seemed they were also faded as if they had been behind a special effects screen that was bleached. Though I could not see the screen, I knew it was there. I marked a 20 degree angle and lined up a mile of Nevada with a passage to Colombia in my best guess of where we were. There was a signal in the note of G. There was an exit nearby but I didn't take it because Rachel was present and I didn't know where she was going.
Rachel and I were traveling down the road in the mobile home with the boxes piled in the back. I thought mom was there, too. I just didn't see her. Rachel was driving and I was sitting in the passenger's seat. I couldn't understand why she was driving though. I felt uneasy. We were going through a part of some town that edged onto a vast, empty, dimming in the sunset, stretch of open land.
"A few more lights, on ramps, and we're on our way." I said to Rachel as she drove. Rachel was, at first, driving calmly but then started to drive all crazy and almost desperately. I was worried and wondered what had gotten her spooked. A red light was up ahead and she was struggling to get the brake peddle down. Then it changed green and we began traveling at an excessive speed. Mom didn't seem to notice, but I said in a strained voice of caution "Shouldn't we slow down a bit? Is there anything wrong?" Rachel nodded to me. A car pulled up ahead of us and then began driving slow. Rachel, still doing about 64 m.p.h., was coming upon the tail of the car fast. I grabbed the dashboard as Rachel finally noticed the distance and slowed down just in time. She then drove around the car and passed it. There was nothing but open, deserted land up ahead. The speed increased to 90 m.p.h. "Are we trying to take off in this thing?" I joked.
The road up ahead suddenly ended, turning into a flattened stretch of a cracked, dry desert with rocks scattered round. I thought at first she had gone off the road but throughout this part of the dream it never seemed that she wasn't in control of the vehicle. I asked if the brakes worked. I looked at Rachel and looked for the traces of anxiety because she scared me.
She replied that she was trying. As we continued through the bumpy ride, I looked out over the land ahead. It was desolate, dismal and dead. A desert out on some plain that spanned some unknown territory. I wondered why we were using that road to begin with, just as the edges of known civilization were disappearing behind us. I asked if everything was okay. I looked over at Rachel once more, and she seemed to be fighting with the brake peddle. I was ready to battle the up-ahead surprise if there were to be any on our way to the endless turbulent landscape of seemingly no return, upon the resolved acknowledgement of no roads. I said that we had to make our escape now. Rachel disappeared from the driver's seat. I turned and connected with the note of G.
I awoke.
I have had dreams myself where I was driving and the brakes wouldn't work. The harder I'd try to brake, the more the car would not respond or only slow a little but not entirely stop, and would sometimes speed faster on. Of course I'd have to steer it away from colliding with anything. Doomed to go down some awry road or stretch of land that never ended in its repeating inclines and steep hills. Here I witnessed the same thing happening to another, which I had experienced myself and knew of the terror.
Rachel and I were trying to get belongings packed up into the back of a mobile home or a van of some kind. Something had just happened, some poor soul was being thrown into a dark place and we were trying to save the belongings from being rummaged through by our enemies. Back inside, Rachel was crying and screaming in anger and disgust.
She was beyond upset, wrathful and defeated. I could have split the realm of Hell with the energy of my own wrath. But I had no clue what had happened. I just knew something happened. Suddenly in an unclear moment I thought she was angry with me because I was feeling defeated and at a breaking point though I could not remember what it was over. I was in a hurry to get things moved. Then I soon realized that she was addressing some demonic shadow in the corner to my left. The room where we stood was dark. It was a roundish living area that connected to a kitchen off to its side. I took note of the circular old house rug on the floor. I wasn't in the mood for throwing down demons. Mainly because I was still in shock over Rachel's apparent nervous breakdown.
I wanted to leave as soon as possible because the place was rather dismal enough by itself. A voice hung in the air. A dull, monotone voice. We couldn't really tell where it was coming from. I turned to Rachel and told her to block it out. She sat down and tightened her knuckles and began making fists, but still crying and yelling. I followed her lead and also commanded the demonic shadow's voice to shut up.
I looked back at Rachel and then looked in the mirror that hung on a nearby wall and Rachel came up and stood next to me. We noticed that both her and I had dark-brown circles under our eyes. We both looked beyond exhausted and so deprived of sleep that we appeared as mere shells of ourselves. Our faces were almost hollow from lack of sleep. We looked as if we had died.
"Rachel!" I pleaded, "We're not getting enough rest, this is an illusion because our flesh bodies are so tired that the shadow is using our weariness to deceive us! I'm here, there's nothing to fear!" Suddenly the demonic shadow appeared to have more shape and leapt from the corner and tore through the living room like a swirling wind inside the diameter of where we were standing. Things began being broken in the fury of the evil presence. Then it left shrieking out of the front door. After a few seconds the place was just a little bit lighter and we continued getting what we could salvage into boxes and loaded into the vehicle. There were broken pieces of mom's favorite tea pot, creamer and cups. I had to throw them away because they were too broken to mend.
Rachel had begun to look like herself again, but still tense. I went back in to get the last of the stuff. I was standing in an almost empty room and examined the wooden floor now with a crumpled gray-white rug sprawled out over it. I grabbed it and folded it. Suddenly little imitation pig-like figures came out of the corners from the walls, standing on their hind-legs. Instead of appearing scary, I thought they just looked stupid. I actually laughed. It seemed they were also faded as if they had been behind a special effects screen that was bleached. Though I could not see the screen, I knew it was there. I marked a 20 degree angle and lined up a mile of Nevada with a passage to Colombia in my best guess of where we were. There was a signal in the note of G. There was an exit nearby but I didn't take it because Rachel was present and I didn't know where she was going.
Rachel and I were traveling down the road in the mobile home with the boxes piled in the back. I thought mom was there, too. I just didn't see her. Rachel was driving and I was sitting in the passenger's seat. I couldn't understand why she was driving though. I felt uneasy. We were going through a part of some town that edged onto a vast, empty, dimming in the sunset, stretch of open land.
"A few more lights, on ramps, and we're on our way." I said to Rachel as she drove. Rachel was, at first, driving calmly but then started to drive all crazy and almost desperately. I was worried and wondered what had gotten her spooked. A red light was up ahead and she was struggling to get the brake peddle down. Then it changed green and we began traveling at an excessive speed. Mom didn't seem to notice, but I said in a strained voice of caution "Shouldn't we slow down a bit? Is there anything wrong?" Rachel nodded to me. A car pulled up ahead of us and then began driving slow. Rachel, still doing about 64 m.p.h., was coming upon the tail of the car fast. I grabbed the dashboard as Rachel finally noticed the distance and slowed down just in time. She then drove around the car and passed it. There was nothing but open, deserted land up ahead. The speed increased to 90 m.p.h. "Are we trying to take off in this thing?" I joked.
The road up ahead suddenly ended, turning into a flattened stretch of a cracked, dry desert with rocks scattered round. I thought at first she had gone off the road but throughout this part of the dream it never seemed that she wasn't in control of the vehicle. I asked if the brakes worked. I looked at Rachel and looked for the traces of anxiety because she scared me.
She replied that she was trying. As we continued through the bumpy ride, I looked out over the land ahead. It was desolate, dismal and dead. A desert out on some plain that spanned some unknown territory. I wondered why we were using that road to begin with, just as the edges of known civilization were disappearing behind us. I asked if everything was okay. I looked over at Rachel once more, and she seemed to be fighting with the brake peddle. I was ready to battle the up-ahead surprise if there were to be any on our way to the endless turbulent landscape of seemingly no return, upon the resolved acknowledgement of no roads. I said that we had to make our escape now. Rachel disappeared from the driver's seat. I turned and connected with the note of G.
I awoke.
I have had dreams myself where I was driving and the brakes wouldn't work. The harder I'd try to brake, the more the car would not respond or only slow a little but not entirely stop, and would sometimes speed faster on. Of course I'd have to steer it away from colliding with anything. Doomed to go down some awry road or stretch of land that never ended in its repeating inclines and steep hills. Here I witnessed the same thing happening to another, which I had experienced myself and knew of the terror.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)