Large Invasions
They all gathered at the entrance and went outside as Dr. George locked the main doors behind them. Upon seeing the number of spacecraft out in the open, now calm air, they looked on in awe and a little fear. As they all got assigned their ships, they were handed some paper and markers, and given last minute details to remain secure inside should there be any unknowns.
Mortamule told everyone they would have radio contact between ships and to be careful because when in range, others, like police, truck drivers, cab drivers and the like would be able to tune in if they happened to pick up the right frequencies.
There was lift off and they were soon flying within the clouds that the mother-ship was giving off. They saw the earth below and it seemed a strange thing that they could see it so clearly while enveloped inside the vapor of a storm cloud. A voice came over the radio.
"Get a feel for your craft! You can steer slight left and right, up and down. Circle on the craft's own axis. But don't get carried away and fly into each other!" Mortamule ordered.
"How fast can we go? Over." asked Ben.
"Be careful, these things can make it to the Bermuda Triangle in less than five!" Mortamule informed them.
"Captain's log, stardate niner six eight point mach speed. We have just traveled through the cosmic vortex of angry heliocentric outbursts, having escaped a Vulcan onslaught, war vessels with laserblasters and leaving the crew in a dire state of an unknown paradox." Penn reported over the radio.
"Could you hear us back at Hell's Basin, before you landed?" Sketch asked Mortamule casually.
"No. No radio contact. By the way, what were you saying? Because it looked strange."
"We said: Welcome to the Islands!" Isotophes answered.
"Lovely ship, fine cruiser, beats anything on the Autobahn." Lurch answered, as well.
"I said 'Get outta here, we don't want any!'" Ben put in. There was a moment of silence and just a slight murmur of static on their radios.
"Besides," Lurch added. "I was unfocused, struggling with every last breath to free myself from a messy glue that had somehow leaked into the vents and got all over me and then I disappeared momentarily."
"Glue?" asked Isotophes. "The vents are in such disrepair!"
"Uh. I don't know if I should bring this up, but I have a monster spider in here with me! It's looking confused, disoriented and hungry." Mortamule reported.
"It's Midgetknuckle! It's just not worth it to panic and fly off to the Bermuda Triangle just because you're afraid of a spider!" said Penn over the radio.
"I'm gonna have to come out of my ship when we all land to retrieve my pet tarantula." Sketch informed the rest.
After about fifteen minutes of slow, shaky flying, the crew came upon some place to land the first of the ships.
Meanwhile, back at some highway cafe parking lot, a truck driver had picked up on most of the radio conversation. He looked confused as he drank from a Pepto Bismol bottle. Quietly unhinged.
"I have a place to land her. Right there, 5 degrees, 11 o'clock. Bring 'em down." Dr. George called out as they started to land over a large area that was the location of an old fort.
Sketch disconnected from the tractor beam at about 35 feet, landed and exited her craft. After all the other ships landed, she retrieved her spider from Mortamule's hair and put it in her chest pocket. Sketch got into another craft and within seconds they were up again. They each took turns disconnecting and landing their respective spacecrafts.
Monday chose a field with a huge red barn to land one of the craft. Nuzz picked out a road that lead to a junkyard for one craft, while Mole landed one of the craft very close to a police station with a sign that said Come get me coppers! Penn found a park and landed there, bumping the ship with a few bangs in the process. He wrote on his craft "Skeet Shooting Sucks!"
Teller landed way out in the middle of a wheat field and simply wrote on his craft "I Fucking Quit! No More Crop Circles!" Mortamule laughed when he saw that. "I like that."
"Can you actually make crop circles in these things?" Penn asked.
"Sure. Do you have another brilliant idea?"
After 30 minutes or so, the crew hovered over a nicely made crop circle that Penn and Teller had made. It was a giant card of the three of clubs.
"You planning to do anything with that?" Breaker asked.
"It's for a card trick." Penn said. "Now the only question is, will it be broadcast over national television?" Breaker doubted it. "Probably not."
"Fuck!" Penn said heavily disappointed. "There goes another large scale card trick."
One ship was left on the steps of a church with a sign that read: Jesus was here. Radiation levels may be safe - but ya never know! All through the night they went about their task, until at last it was time to return to Hell's Basin. Penn and Teller insisted on flying back in one craft, bringing the total of ships to three, making their way back to their secret base.
"Yeah, they'll believe this! We get stuck out in Hell's Basin, some people steal a fleet of spaceships from Area 51, we have to ditch the spaceships in wheat fields, parking lots, lighthouses, drive-in theaters, amphitheaters and some have samples of our handwriting all over them!" Penn states in a continuous tone before sighing. Their little adventure wasn't over yet and they all knew it.
"You know, Fester," Sketch radioed, bringing up a point. "My spider is somewhere in one of these craft, and we're crammed in here pretty good. Don't frighten the poor thing as he likes to jump when scared."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRGGHH!" said Penn.
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